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Feeling stressed and pregnant. How should I handle this discovery about my husband?

Tagged as: Cheating, Family, Health, Pregnancy, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 February 2016) 3 Answers - (Newest, 6 February 2016)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Ok so I'm 6/7 weeks pregnant and I've been very very emotional and irrational the last few days.

I went looking for a link in the history of my laptops Internet (my other half had obviously just been using it before me) and saw that he looked up a girl on facebook that he dated briefly while we were broken up a couple of years ago. We were broken up for two months. And things have been great since back together.

Anyway I freaked out and he said she popped up on his news feed and then said she actually came up in the toolbar while searching for something else. I know for a fact he is lying because I can tell. I think he lied to avoid conflict (he sometimes does this). Anyway I got really upset and started crying asking him if he was going to cheat on me and all sorts.

I know rationally that he was probably just thinking of something and she popped into his head and he just looked her up. (He was on her Facebook page for one minute according to history) and if there was something untoward about it he would have just deleted the history.

So why am I so freaking upset! And I mean I am really upset!!

We havent had sex in 4 weeks as he was super stressed out with work and then I had some pregnancy complications and I feel like he's avoiding me (but rationally I don't think he is) .... I feel crazy :-( please advise...

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (6 February 2016):

Honeypie agony auntWell you are right, her name didn't JUST pop up in the search. And I'd tell him that he NEEDS to quit lying because it makes everything 10 times more shady. My guess is he lied because he really didn't have a "good" excuse to look her up.

Now, it doesn't mean he was looking to to hook up with her or anything like that, maybe he was just curious. We all are from time to time. Curious to see where an ex is at in life, now that HE will be a father soon'ish. So there are big changes ahead for him.

I would relax. And not having sex on and off during the pregnancy is not abnormal either.

Honey, don't waste your energy on unimportant stuff. And that... was unimportant.

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A female reader, goldie22 United Kingdom +, writes (6 February 2016):

Feeling g a bit crazy is completely normal when your pregnant. I was like it with both my daughter's. Yes its upset you because it reminds you of a time when you were not together, and the last thing you want when pregnant is to feel like things arent secure. Chances are he was being nosey. Try to put it behind you and concentrate on being well for yourself and baby. But do talk to him about your feelings. Best of luck with your pregnancy. X

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2016):

I don't think this is anything to worry about, we all have a little look at our ex's on facebook from time to time. If you'd found messages between them however, completely different story!

I would put this down to your hormones going crazy, just try not to think about it. I know it's easier said than done, but you can't let this ruin your relationship.

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