A
female
age
26-29,
*avannah9000
writes: Almost every girl in my school has a boyfriend except for me and im starting 2 feel kinda sad and ulgy and fat and i want some addvice like what boys look for in a girl and stuff im just kinda feeling lonely i mean im like 13 and i have never ever had a boy friend plzzz help
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female
reader, blondie_1991 +, writes (5 May 2010):
Hi :)
I'm 18 and still havent had a proper bf. I know its easy for people to say 'oh its no big deal' but I can totally understand how you are feeling.
Sometimes it is easier if you're not actually looking for anythin, then somethin will happen. What you really need is people around you who you can talk to.
I have had plenty of experience feeling how you do, trust me, but obviously I dont want to start leaving all of these experiences on here, but feel free to private message me and we can just talk through things :)
hope this helps xx
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (5 May 2010):
I was 16 when I had my first girlfriend. The point is, there is plenty of time. And you shouldn't have a boyfriend because you're lonely. If you're lonely, you need to make sure you have friends and feel good about your life. Then you'll be in a better position to meet a great guy. There's not rush at all.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2010): Wow, you're lucky! When I was thirteen I never even had people I could call my friends, let alone a girl to like, so don't worry. In a few years, you'll see that everything reverses usually, and the people who appear skinny and beautiful in your eyes will go downhill, and you'll be the one who gets looked at and thought about, so don't rush and think about any of that now, and just concentrate on school and getting good grades at your age.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (5 May 2010):
Confidence is a very strong asset. You need to feel confidence about yourself and your body. Be happy and bubbly and it will attract the boys.
When you are confident, your character will shine through.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2010): I didnt have a boyfriend till I was 15, loads of my other friends did, but somehow I was always solidly in the "friend" category.... until somehow at 15 I suddenly got sexy, and since then, I havent ever been short of guys wanting to be my boyfriend! IM not one of those girls who cant stand to be single, so ive not always HAD a boyfriend but that was my choice not theirs! :P
So my fist advice is, youre 13, dont give in to peer pressure, and beat yourself up cuz youre not at quite the same stage as everyone else.... secondly be happy, be outgoing, make sure you have lots of guy friends cuz then youre used to hanging out wiht guys and are fun to be around, and have interests and things you are into, play sports or do art or music, something so you arent always hanging around waiting for a boy!
Also, by not racing into boyfriends too young, your mom and dad will have a lot more trust in you and give you more freedom when you really want it! :D
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2010): Hi I'm 18 and I didn't get my first boyfriend till I was arond your age. At 13 it's really not a big deal not to have a boyfriend, although it might feel that way. I'm sure you aren't ugly or fat but if you keep thinking this way you'll develope a negative body image, one think that's unattractive is low self-esteem.
I can give you some advice from who I dated when I was your age. I always dated my friends, although that can sometimes ruin a friendship. Here's the thing though boys are shy at 13 and 14. They probably aren't going to ask a girl out because they are afriad of being rejected. My first three boyfriends, all around 13 or 14 I asked out. The first boy to actually ask me out was 16 at the time. Before that I always did the asking out. Asking someone out can be really scarey though. But here's what I did. I just asked them out causally. I got rejected a few times also. Although it was awkward all I did was shrug and smile and say, "That's okay." I remember I had a boy be really shocked after he rejected me and this was my answer, he was like, "You don't even seem upset?" I replied with, "It's not a big deal." Because you know what it isn't a big deal.
If you are deathly afraid of asking a boy out just try to causally flirt around with a few guys you like. If they flirt back you can build on that and work up the courage to ask them out or there's always the old, "I like this boy who (describing the guy you are actually talking to)" Usually the guy gets the hint and will ask you out if he likes you.
Hope this helps!
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