A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I let fear in my head keep me from doing plenty of things in life. I think I talk to myself to much in my head. I always think to myself I can't do this or if I do it someone will talk about and I'll end up making myself nervous or shy because I think to myself alot and I tell myself someone may talk about you and you cant do it. I know its normal to think to yourself but what I think is unnormal and I think is bad for me. I always focus on what will others think of me instead of living life. I walk through life like I own it and not think negative with low self esteem and not worry what others think. Does anyone have any advice that may make me come out of my shy shell?
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female
reader, bardia +, writes (10 November 2011):
 I was in your situation when I was your age. It held me back from SOOOOO many things. I reluctantly started taking antianxiety/antidepression meds. The change was truly amazing. I took them for 11 years and decided to try life without them this year, but find I need to go back to them for a little help. But in general, I don't have nearly as much fear about anything when I take them. It takes a long time to find the right ones. Don't give up hope if you start and don't seem to be getting results right away. Work with someone who really understands the chemistry behind it. Don't get me wrong. There are still some things that I fear, physically, emotionally, etc., but with the help of counseling and the meds, life really is much better and I can actually enjoy it! Good luck. If you have any other questions about it, message me.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (10 November 2011):
 Bungee jumping. There's nothing that builds confidence like overcoming a shitty scary experience and walking away alive. After doing that, you wont care what others think of you. Alternatively do something else that takes loads of gut and courage. You need to step out of your comfort zone, say "screw it all" and DO the things you are afraid of. Even if they go down the drain and you fail miserably. At least you gave it a hole heartedly try. But definitely go bungee jumping. It's the quickest solution.
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A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (10 November 2011):
 Fear can be crippling, but YOU can conquer fear. Instead of using fear as a cop out, viewing it as an obstacle, or letting it run your life, make a plan to overcome it.
Make a list of all of the things you are afraid of, and slowly (but surely) take action on removing that fear. And instead of telling yourself you can't, affirm to yourself proudly... "I CAN".
And I think with your confidence/low self esteem issues playing such a huge factor, this article may be of benefit for you: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/need-a-confidence-booster.html
Best of luck to you!
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