A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi. I was just wondering... If a man looks at a woman, who has been looking at him, and she immediately looks away, is this generally because she 1) Does not want to give the impression that she fancies him? or 2) She wants him to think that she actively dislikes him? Thanks for your general views on this! Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2009): ...thank you everyone! Well in that case it's confession time: I did speak to her and asked her out only to find out that she was already dating a guy from my office. Oops! After that I guess I felt a little embarrassed and went to ground for a little while to 'recover' / lick my wounds. So, perhaps she was looking at me thinking 'I wonder how he is doing in coping with rejection' rather than 'wow - check him out!'. In fact before I asked her out there was another time when I caught her looking at me whereupon she suddenly looked away. A few weeks after that she called after me down the corridor and came up to me all smiles with absolutely nothing to talk about. So I put this all together and asked her out. Perhaps she just enjoyed flirting with me with no intention of anything further happening. However, if she was already seeing some guy from the office then she really should not have been flirting with me at all. All in all I think she was flattered by the attention and perhaps when she's having a bad day in the office likes to remind herself of the fact that I fancy her so as to give herself a little ego boost every now and again. Ultimately though I don't think anything is going to happen between us even though I am much better looking than her man (as if you had to ask!). He's a successful guy though - whereas I'm low on confidence at the moment, and as we all know, confidence is king! Thank you once again for taking the trouble to respond to my post. All the best to you.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (1 March 2009):
 I'm with Jessica Rabbit. Don't guess; find out. Also, play it cool: maybe you had a little mustard on your face and she didn't know how to tell you?
If the woman likes you and wants to have something with you, she will find a way to tell you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2009): You know humans have evolved the faculty of language for very good reason :)
Who knows what it means? Maybe women look at men they don't fancy. Maybe they don't look at men they do fancy. Maybe it's all random, or you had spinach in your teeth.
Eye contact is an intimate thing so if I catch the eye of a complete stranger I usually look away. End of story. If you have a girl in mind you should stop trying to mind-read and just SPEAK TO HER
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A
female
reader, wonderingcat +, writes (1 March 2009):
 Could be that she needs new glasses or contact lenses?
Women look away could be for a number of different reasons, but definitely not because she dislikes him (basing this on your posting). For this one, it could simply be because (a) she was just "checking you out" and did not want you to find out, (b) just by accident she turned away as you looked at her direction, (c) she wasn't looking at you but the person behind you, or (d) it is all in your head only LOL
You do know that a good speaker in seminars always look above your eye level - preferrably above your head - when there are many people attending. That way, each person thinks that the speaker is looking at them!
Cat
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A
male
reader, MyDestiny  +, writes (1 March 2009):
 welll she could have been cheking you out when you weren;t lookin and when you turn around and see her she turns around too cause she doesn't want you to know that she's been staring at you the whole time..
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