A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I am a teacher in a middle school and I've been seeing a co-worker of mine for about seven months now. We're the youngest teachers (23) by far and three weeks ago I found out that I'm pregnant with his and my first child. There are a lot of older, very opinionated people I work with and I feel like once this comes out I'll be ostracized because we are not married. Not only that, I have not told him because I'm not sure how he'll react. I am very excited and I'm sure he'll stay with me through this, but I can never seem to bring it up when I'm with him. I'm starting to have morning sickness and I had to call out on Friday because I was so sick so I went to see an OB-GYN. My biggest fear is not telling him, it's telling the people I work with. My question is after I tell him and if I get a positive response from him, how do I tell our co-workers? And if I don't get a positive response from him, which I highly doubt, how do I continue working with him and them?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2013): I am 19 years old and I have 2 beautfull kids. My oldest is almost 2 years old and my youngest is 6 months old I wasn't merried when I got pregnant with my first baby and everything worked out now my son has a lil brother
A
female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (10 May 2013):
 I have two small children and I'm 24 now. I love them with all of my heart and wouldn't trade them for the world.
I am not married. This isn't the 50's where you are shunned if you have a child out of wedlock. What you do in our private life is no one else's business. Although I am curious as to what state you live in because I've never heard of that.
Don't let them bother you or take away from this momentous occassion. First baby! Congratulations!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2013): Hello all. I'm the original poster. So I told my boyfriend and he's SOOOO excited! I feel terrible still for keeping it from him, but he understood and we're making plans to get married at a court house in a couple months because in my state only married parents are considered legal guardians of a child and he wants this child, which I"m thrilled about. We'll have to wait for a big wedding until after the baby is born, but we announced we're expecting to both of our parents and they are excited as well. Some of your feedback was another concern of mine, like being a single parent, but for now it looks like I will have him in my life. I appreciate everyone for responding and I hope this all works out!
Thanks again!
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2013): First things first here OP. He needs to be told, and soon.
We can't answer any of your questions with any degree of certainty. He knows your colleagues better than us and he's the best person to discuss all this with.
OP stop delaying this, please don't take this the wrong way but I'd pretty pissed if I got a girl pregnant and she waited weeks to tell me. It's a huge, life changing thing I would not for one second see any valid reason for delaying that. I'd actually feel a little insulted to be honest that she'd assume I'm not man enough to handle being told about it.
Instead of telling him you just sit there fearing the worst and do nothing? What are you waiting for?
OP I had one friend who made a girl pregnant and she waited until after the cut off point for an abortion to tell him. He had no intention of asking her for that and would happily have welcomed a child but he couldn't deal with the fact that she not only didn't trust him enough to be able to handle it like a man but that she would do something as manipulative as to go behind his back like that. Her excuse? She didn't know how he'd react and wanted to make sure abortion was not going to be thing he could suggest.
Well guess what, it backfired massively for her and he dumped her for that. Frankly I would do the same in his position.
I'm not trying to make you paranoid OP, but this is not something you want to sit on for too long. It's far too important to not tell him as soon as possible.
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A
female
reader, lostlizzie  +, writes (5 May 2013):
 Hi there. Well, firstly, you should tell your partner. You need to get that over and done with before you let your co workers know. And what they say is only matter of opinion. Your pregnancy and relationship 'status' are YOUR personal life. So if they have bad comments just retort with something along the lines of 'good thing its my own life, and good thing that we all have free will to choose how we live' a comment like that can usually only be responded with an 'oh yeah..' besides, its your life!! And if your relationship with the daddy of the baby is a happy safe honest and open one, insure the daddy will be very happy. Basically , don't over think it, it will probably turn out just fine. Good luck, i hope i helped, let me know if i did :D
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2013): Having a baby is the most exciting event in the live of a couple. Don't hesitate! tell him whether he stays with you or not. It is your duty and obligation towards the coming baby to tell his dad of his arrival.If he is a decent guy he will marry you and then take it from there come what may. Good luck.
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