A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So my ex girlfriend broke up with me about a month ago after 2 years ago and when she broke up with me, she said that we could still be friends, but the other day i told her that i still wanted to be friends with her, but i need time to myself to get my head straight and that I'll contact her when I'm ready? Did i do the right thing? I mean, i still love her and wants to be with her, but she already likes someone else and I'm trying to move on from her so I'm not hurting anymore
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broke up, ex girlfriend, move on, my ex Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks:)I already have to do that when i wake up for school, but I'll definitely try that on weekends or when I'm on breaks from school....but man here's another situation, i was dating her long distance, i live in AZ and she lives in Cali..and I'm coming to Cali in like a week or so..Which I REALLY dont want to go cause then I'll think about her like crazy, ha what an f up situation I'm in
A
male
reader, Andy00  +, writes (22 May 2011):
 Dreams aren't really avoidable, but a suggestion I have for in the mornings (and this isn't going to be great news if you're the kind of person who likes to lie-in in the mornings), but it if you wake up and find yourself thinking about her, get up immediately. I once read that when you wake up in the morning, this is usually when we feel at our lowest, and often it's the thought of ones we love that we think about to put us in a better mood. As time goes in, your brain trains itself to think about a loved one because it knows that it would ordinarily make us happy, unaware that it is actually making us feel worse because that loved one is no longer with us. By getting out of bed and getting on with your day, you will start to counter the way your mind works and your brain will eventually stop immediately going back to your ex and think about other things.
Now, I accept that all that may not be entirely factual, as I can't remember where I read it so the source may not be a reliable one, but all I know is I tried it and it worked for me, so give it a go and see if it'll helps you too!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSounds like you have some bad luck! But my problem isnt facebook, my problem is that whenever i sleep..i always end up having dreams about her,I'd wake up missing her...so I'd tell myself all of the bad things that she has ever done to me!
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A
male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (21 May 2011):
I did the same thing you did. Sadly in my case, somehow, I always managed to stumble across her picture (like, she'd appear in my list of friends on the left hand side of my profile page) and each time I did my heart would leap a little in panic. In the end, deleting her altogether was the only option. Hopefully you'll be okay and you won't have to take the measures I did, but remember if you do there's nothing wrong with that. It's just a way of trying to move forward.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks AndyOO...well i didnt delete her from my facebook, but I just blocked all of her post so that i dont see any of her status or picture, so pretty much i cant see anything that she post on facebook...its kinda like blocking her in a way, but not really haha.
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A
male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (20 May 2011):
My answer to that is to remove her from Facebook. Not out of spite or because you don't want to be friends anymore, but because it will help you heal faster. You could always explain that to her before you do it, but I really think it's for the best. I did that with my most recent ex-girlfriend and it's such a nice feeling to go online without fear of seeing/reading anything you don't want to see/read. Also, it isn't as though you need to keep her removed permanently. You can add her again at a time when you have moved on and are able to be friends with her, if that's something you want of course, in time you may not even want friendship anymore.
I think you have the right attitude and have the determination to move on. Just continue to take things one step at a time and you'll be fine! Keep us posted!
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionright now i feel like she doesn't care about me cause she's posting all that stuff all over her facebook and it hurts to read them, but your right about one thing...i need to focus on MYSELF right now. I spend the last 2 yrs trying to make her happy and its time i make myself happy and not worry so much about her
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (18 May 2011):
 that might not necessarily be the case, don't be so hard on what you two had. sometimes people run into new relationships to escape the sting of breakups and the loneliness being single can bring. She's not necessarily better off jumping into something she's probably not emotionally ready for, but you have to respect her choice. For now, focus on yourself until you feel ready to re-enter the dating scene with other girls and maybe the friendship scene with your ex-girlfriend. Take care!
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advices guys and today I found out that she's already dating someone, which really hurts me beyond believe...but it made me realize that not talking to her at all is the right thing to do...yes I may still be in love with her, but if she can move on so quickly shows that she doesn't care about me.
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A
male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (18 May 2011):
That's a very brave sensible decision you've made, well done! Trying to be friends with someone you love can be agonising and it's something to be avoided. Give yourself time for your feelings to cool and hopefully one day you two can be friends. Just make sure you give yourself time, you don't want to rush it.
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (18 May 2011):
that is completely the right thing to do. do what you can to recover so that you can GET back to that friendship level, if possible; otherwise both of you will be in pain.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2011): I know it's hard to move on when you love that specail person so much i think your doing the right thing you need to think things through and don't jump the gun to quickly, being friends with your ex can be a bit award at times but you will over come that, iam still in love with someone from my past but he doesn't like me back. but it's ok.
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