A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: My son's father had a problem with smoking weed that lead to a cocaine problem. I got out of there and he never tried to see our son,so i just moved on. Now he's 9 and his father is trying to get custody of him, i tried talking to him but he really gets to me, because he wont admit that he was wrong to put drugs before us. He even still smokes weed! Is there anything i can do to stop him getting custody?
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female
reader, asian tealeaf +, writes (11 March 2009):
good news for YOu! if YOu can prove he was not around to see his son nor made any true atttempts inn the past 9 yrs, then the court will question his seriousness at his claims to want to be a father NOW. after all, you just cant walk away, they have a term for it, its called child abandonement and now, the courts will be looking also at his drug habits etc. even if hes cleaned himself up and has been clean for a couple yrs, or more, they are not going to take him too lightly, and, as YOu have raised the child all this time, the child has bonded with YOu, and the courts will take that very seriously into consideration. a 9 yr old, while a minor, may still be asked what he or she feels. if anything, dad will have some minimal visitation rights, and thats it. as they say, anyone can be a father. it takes a real man to be, a dad.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2009): As the previous responder has said...they won't give custody of a minor to someone with a drug problem. It may only be weed, but he has a past history of cocaine use. he will most likely deny it in court, so if there is any evidence you can produce...it will help. Mothers usually have a better chance of custody. What are his grounds for fighting for custody. If it's just the fact that he wants it, he doesn't have a leg to stand on. If you also have a past history, you need to gather proof that you have changed your life! It's all a matter of being better prepared for your day in court.
How does your son feel about all this? It is a shame that he has to be put in the middle of all this!
Good Luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2009): Hi, yes, please get a lawyer. Tell a judge why you do not want your ex to have custody of your son. Nobody will turn a child over to someone with a drug problem.
Be strong and do what you have to do for your son! If money is a problem, I know that you can get free consultations at least so that might help. Or maybe google free legal help/advice? Good luck!
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