A
female
age
41-50,
*roken33
writes:Ok so im needing some advice my ex of four months came back into the picture saying how much he missed me. We hung out for a few weeks and things were going great i didn't bring up the past just went with the flow. Now he.isn't taking my calls and i don't understand what is going on. Some insight would be nice and do i still date other people or is that going to ruin our chances in the long run.
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female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (31 May 2012):
 You have to think about why you broke up and see if there's a repeating connection to the prior problems. Usually it's a bad idea to get back into a relationship with an ex because the old problems that caused the break up will almost always resurface and destroy it again. You should probably keep him as an "ex" and move on.
A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (31 May 2012):
 If you sift through Dear Cupid and read some of the posts about ex's you will see a pattern in a lot of them similar to your own.
Ex keeps coming back giving the illusion that they want to get back together, you play the game and then without warning, they go again. Few months pass and they are back again, being ambiguous, maybe having sex with you again and then you find out they are dating someone else.
It's usually men who do this to women (but sometimes the tables turn).
They come back because they are trying to fill a hole temporarily. They need to know they are still desirable and someone is still wanting them (but they don't necessarily want you). They come back because they miss having sex (they don't miss you...just the sex).
If he wanted you back, he would be back for good and would not have dissapeared again.
Ignore these phrases he may tell you:
'I am confused right now'
'I don't know what I want'
'I need space'
'I miss you' (and then dissapears again)
'Can we be friends with benefits and see how it goes'
'I don't want any ties right now'
' I love you but I am not IN love with you'
ALL THESE THINGS MEAN ONE THING ONLY 'I DO NOT WANT TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU'
My advice would be to take control, ignore him, block him, delete him and go out and live your life.
If he comes back, tell him, unless you see 100% commitment (because that's what you want) over a sustained period of time and have proof that the relationship can move foward...then it's adios amigo!!
Use your head...don't let men mess you around.
Be smart.
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