A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Panties of ex gf in the drawer...Hey all, I found penties of ex girlfriend at my boyfriends drower...and I don't know what to do...The problem is that I found it in his bag, which was closed and contained other memorabilia from his ex girlfriends, like cds and photos and little presents, nothing major...And together with all of these - panties...I felt like throwing up at the first moment, out of shock and disappointment... I don't want him to have these panties in our bedroom anymore, I was thinking to throw them secretly...but if he found out he would know I was searching his things...And I wanted to talk to him about these, but again I would open the fact that I was looking at his things without permission... And this could break our sincere relations...But sooner or later he would notice that I am nervous...What to do??? Please, help!!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2010): Hey, guys!
I need to tell you the results, they are funny!;))))
When I asked my boyfriend who the penties belong to and why he is keeping them... You won't believe, but he started laughing! It was a present of university girls for at the graduation party, and they put their names on it, in different handwriting. And I believed that, because I know those girls and it's hard to imagine my boyfriend with some of them:) So, I am happy now, and would suggest to everyone to talk immediately as the problem arises, because sometimes it's your imagination, and the problem doesn't exist, and you suffer for a long time in vain. Communication should be at first place, and only then the stressful reactions, like mine at the beginning.
Thanks for support, I already felt a lot better after I wrote it down here, as there are not many friends you want to tell all these intimate things, and here there are virtual friends, so it's great;)
Lots of love to all!;)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2010): Thank you lotsalove, you are very supportive:) I will talk to him tonight, and I will let you know how it was. And we are for 3 years together and recently moved, so he couldn't "totally forget" about all that stuff...and what about the names of the girls, some of which I know and I had no idea he was with them too!!! What a stress...Before it was too cloudless...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2010): thank you...I am going to tell him now very casually, but I just discovered the penties have the names of several girls on it...Trofies???????!!
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A
male
reader, baddogbj +, writes (13 July 2010):
Lotsalove has it exactly right. Keep it casual and stress free and the odds are he'll casually tell you that you can bin it.
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A
female
reader, Lotsalove. +, writes (13 July 2010):
You should just be totally honest with him and ask him 'Do you still need all of this stuff?'.
The exact same thing happened to me after about 4 months of being with my current boyfriend. I had recently moved in and was cleaning our bedroom when i found all his ex girlfriends memorabilia in a box at the bottom of the closet and he just said 'Ah you can throw that out, i totally forgot i had it'. So as you can imagine, i quite happily did.
Ok i was cleaning so i wasnt snooping, but just be honest with him, he could have literally forgotten about it, If he gets mad then its worth questioning the relationship. Why would he want to keep them now he has you?
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