A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:We dated for two years and then I broke up with him because I was in college and it wasn't working with us. Kind of hit him out of the blue because he had no clue anything was wrong. He logged on my fb and read a convo between me and this guy that I was interested in and went crazy. (ya should have changed password after the breakup but...) Seriously thought he was having a nervous breakdown and had to hide the relationship with new guy. About six months later, new guy ended and ex tried to win me back, but he was weird, like we would hang out but could never get close because he held back his feelings about everything. Never discussed the other guy or anything. It got to be awkward, and started losing feelings again and was talking to him less. In this time period, he got really drunk one night and slept with this disgusting girl who worked with me and has slept with so many guys its impossible to keep count. I was pretty insulted to say the least and I told him I would never talk to him again, he'd have to initiate it. So thru friends, I learn he is really sorry for what he did, but we still haven't talked and its like eight months later. The real awkward part, because he's friends with my friends sometimes we are thrown together. The latest incident was going out, we were all in a car, yet he still won't speak to me. I'm not gonna be the one to talk first since it annoyed me he never said sorry or anything to ME for what he did. Why won't he talk to me? I know I hurt him really bad because people said even after we stopped talking he still had a thing for me. But he hurt me too when he slept with that girl. It's weird being like two feet away from someone you loved and not acknowledging they exist, like what is his problem, did I traumatize him that much that he can't even speak to me? one of my friends said "he doesn't want to talk to you", like I just don't get why since we both did wrong things, although he claims through friends that since we weren't dating when he slept with her I shouldn't really be mad. I just don't understand him, any insight on what's in his head?
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female
reader, VelvetUnderground  +, writes (10 August 2011):
Boys are grumpy selfish creatures sometimes, by sleeping with others you've hurt him and though he hurt you, in his eyes what you did was worse and he feels you sould be the one to appoligise
Its sounds like if you do want to be friends with him you need to make this first move, give him a hand shake, ask a question about him/his family anything, then say something along the lines of i know thing happened in the past and i'm sorry, if he doesn't then appoligise i guess maybe to give up on this guy and let him sulk
Good luck!!
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