A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi cupids! im getting a bit fed up and stressed out with this now if im honest! my boyfriend and i have been in a relationship for almost 4 years, because i was only 15 and he was 22, it was difficult to spend time with each other at first! but our families soon came round and he now lives with me and my family, we both work full time, he is also studying part time and its difficult for us to spend time together! i found out im pregnant (im 21 weeks) and were both over the moon about it, but i feel like im coping with my pregnancy alone! he comes to hospital appointments, but i see my midwife alone, we dont go to antinatal classes and ive so far done all the shopping alone! our sex life is none existant (sex has recently become very painful, to the point where i end up in tears so i just dont want to try anymore!) and everything just seems to be falling apart! (it could just be my hormones, i understand that, but idont know) we've recently started looking for a new home, for the 3 of us, were hoping to find somewhere perfect before our arrival i just feel like a move could completely break us up :/ im considering going part time at work, so i can be home more when he's around (our shifts are different) but dont know if it will help! i suggest going out for a meal, or going shopping for baby, or just going for a drive somewhere and he just doesnt seem interested! i just feel like im puttin in all the effort and hes not interested! we've both got holidays to take at work, so i thought maybe a few days away, maybe a week, just the two of us could help, i just dont want to suggest it incase it stresses him out more! some days, its perfect, like yesterday, he had the day off work, when i finished at 6, i got home and he'd done our washing, cleaned up, made us food and he'd ran me a gorgeous bath, when i got in he gave me a massive cuddle and he told me he loved us, he even ironed my pjamas for me so they were warm when i put them on! lol. we had a perfect night cuddled up, then today.. no idea! barely got a word out of him and hes back to his usual self! i cant help feelin that its me thats bothering him! i just dont understand!! i try speakin to him but he doesnt wanna listen.. i viewed a house this morning which was perfect! two bedrooms, perfect garden, a price we could afford easily! and i rang him to tell him and his reply was 'can we just talk about this some other time' and he hung up! now i do feel like im pestering him! but if i give him space he sulks more!! some days i feel like just walking away!!! how can i keep this relationship going? everything seemed perfect before i got pregnant! (we both want the baby, as unexpected as it was!) i just dont know what i can do! has anyone else been through this?! any advice would probably help! id be so greatful! thanks for reading sorrry its long! x
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female
reader, LovelyLemon  +, writes (30 January 2012):
 It's incredibly inconsiderate for him to blow you off and not be emotionally supportive like that, but he is also going through stresses just like you are. Women are generally happier about pregnancy than men are, they get that nesting instinct, which it seems like you've got! Wanting to go house hunting and baby shopping and such, men just generally aren't as into that. This doesn't mean that he has an excuse to not be supportive.If you love this guy, stay with him. It will be exceptionally beneficial for your baby to have their father around and have a family that is together. Have a talk with him, tell him that you would like some more support from him emotionally. This is a difficult time for many women, it makes you easily upset and stressed and questioning. Hopefully he will open up about his concerns and stresses as well. Talking is the ultimate key here, communication is the life force of relationships. He loves you, he loves your baby, and I'm sure he will take your feelings to heart.Much love and Best wishes
A
female
reader, Amanda13 and in love +, writes (29 January 2012):
you probaly think im stupid for being my age and answering this but alot of the time men have hormonal changes during the piriod thair wife is preganat so wat i would do is confrunt him on how you fill and see how he reacts if he still dont change tan tell him your going to leave his sorry *** if he dont stratin up and dont wimp out if after that he's stil a jurk leave him thair you are way to good for a low life son of a b**** by by
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