A
female
age
36-40,
*nn84
writes:Hey Guys,Thank you for this site cuz whenever I have problem, everyone is trying to help me..I have problem with my bf whom I havent seen him since he went to his country for 2 weeks because sickness of his granddad. I know its really hard for him cuz his granddad raised him and now he is about to die.. he promised me to call when he went there and almost 1st week he called me everyday once a time cuz in that part of country, its hard to find cards to put money inside..ok I can understand cuz he went there not for vacation 2nd week, he didint call me and he didint call me on valentines day but he made me suprise for valentines day by sending gift to my house( he told me he ordered one beffore he leaves)one day later, after valentines day, ''he called me and hope u understand cuz my granddad is really sick I was streesed out'' ok since friday he didint call me and today he was supposed to come with his parents to US. but he didint come and never had contact with me I was sooooo disapointed cuz I felt so upset he ddint even let me know whats happening My heart is broken if Iam his girl whyy why he didint let me to know that he cancelled his ticket? maybe I dont deserve it its my guess maybe his granddad is died..guys pls tell me if Iam thinking right...everyday u have hope that ur gonna call you or ur waiting he is coming this day then no calls
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female
reader, Moon13 +, writes (24 February 2010):
 patience is a virtue ... :)
A
female
reader, ann84 +, writes (23 February 2010):
ann84 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Even though my bf came to Ny, He doesnt call me anymore or text me so much.. I feel like we are not relationship no calls no texting or barely saying I love u even though we havent see each other for 1 month because he went to his country for his granddad..
Then I got his text that '' sorry babe, i coudnt text u.Iam going through depression Idk what to do with my granddad just know that I love u with all my heart.
I text him bck by saying '' whenever u need help I'll be always with u and I really would like to help you love u so much too.
and he said ok love u so much
thts it... I dk what to do it has been a long time not to see him.. and ofcourse I should be patient but I wanna see him cuz I miss him a lot and he never offered me to hang out..It really makes me sad...
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A
female
reader, ann84 +, writes (22 February 2010):
ann84 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey Guys,
thank u so much forur great advice:) guess what on saturday morning he called me that he'll be here on saturday night:) so I had thought he was supposed to be here thrday or friday but I had misunderstood:))
When He came to US he called me, His granddad was so sick and he was stressed out thats why he wasnt even able to call me.. he called me yesterday when he arrived his house we didint talk to much..
It is just so weird cuz idk how to behave him after 2.5 week later and during 2.5 weeks we couldnt even keep in touch.. so thats why we didint say each other I love u or miss u.. idk I hope everything will be fine
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (20 February 2010):
Don't break up. He won't be cheating. He just needs your patience. You are his girlfriend.
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A
female
reader, ann84 +, writes (20 February 2010):
ann84 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank u guys.. hopefully everything will be ok and I'll try to be mora patient and I even think that maybe he cheat on me or wanna break up.. I was just worried because he was supposed to come yesterday to the US. but no phone calls at least he should have let me know if Iam still his gf...
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A
female
reader, ann84 +, writes (20 February 2010):
ann84 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank u guys for giving me advice and Iwill try to be patient and not to be hurt.. and I wont expect him to call me anymore sometimes at least he should have let me know that he cancelled his plane ticket because he was supposed to be in the US yesterday but if all family didint come, I guess his granddad would be dead..
I even do not wanna talk to him because Iam also sensitive and Iam hurt and expected him to share his feelings with me but thats ok right now.. I even think that maybe he cheat on me over there and wanna end up relationship.. I do not wanna make myself more upset anymore by thinking of him.. u think maybe we should break up?
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (20 February 2010):
The big secret about men is this. When we're hurting, we retreat into ourselves. He does love you. Really he does. He sent you the Valentines gift and did call. What he needs right now is for you to have patience. If his Grandfather brought him up, he will be hurting and will need to really spend time thinking. Trust him. He'll need you when he gets back.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2010): I know it's hard not to feel incredibly worried.. and usually (since I've been through the same ordeal minus the bf's sick family member), I know how easy it is to feel hurt and angry.
My bf went to the other side of the world on a 'business trip' and never contacted me for weeks. I thought he'd left me. He was being dishonest with me in the end.. but in YOUR case, I beg you not to worry.
He has a sick grandparent, one that he was very closed to that practically raised him. I would try your best not to put pressure on him right now and just be there for him when he's ready to talk. If he DIDN'T have a sick relative he was close to, I would be giving the complete opposite advice. But you need to think about what he's going through.. and it probably all feels surreal to him right now.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2010): it seems that he is under preasure
regarding his grandpa's health status..
remember that he called during valentine and sent you gifts
so you dont need to be so worried..
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A
female
reader, Moon13 +, writes (20 February 2010):
I think you should be more patient, and understanding and less selfish. His siutation with his grad dad is a critical one and you have no idea if the grand dad passed away or got worse, etc..and he and his family are gathered and united trying to support each other. The last thing he needs right now is to be told, "Why haven't you called me?".. he needs your support, understanding, and kindness when he is ready to get in touch with you.You have to understand that everyone is different and everyone in critical times have different views of handling them. Some like to be left alone in times like these, and others need to constantly be in touch.. give him the benefit of the doubt...and trust that he is not doing this on purpose.. good luck
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