A
female
age
26-29,
*issesmidnight
writes:I could probably say I'm one of the 'Popular Girls' at my school. Everyone knows who I am, and I'm best friends with all the girls I would call popular. The difference with me is I'm more laid back. I'm not one to start drama, rumors, and when it does start I usually tend to exclude myself from it. I'm more of a party kind of girl. I'm very outgoing, I make friends very easily, I'm 'out there' at parties and I like to have a little fun getting in trouble with the guys. I'm usually one to love being single, I've only ever had four relationships that were either very short, or very boring and my last one was over a year ago. Lately I've been feeling kind of alone, I want that kind of guy in my life now. But everytime I find myself falling for someone (which is very rare) my heart gets broken. I never cry, it just makes me feel depressed and lowers my confidence and self esteem. What do I do?
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male
reader, wolfred bane  +, writes (12 November 2010):
 well it seems to me that your'e a girly-tomboy.well that just means you are a girly girl, but get along(friend wise)great with guys for some reason.frm what i read, the problem seems to be with the guys.this i dun understand.i mean come on! who dosen't like a girly-tomboy?dun wry, your'e fine. those guys dun know a gem when they see one.
the thing is that the nice guys are always shy.The guys who act macho....well aren't.
ya noe i'll rather be in your shoes(are they sneakers? i dun wear heels im a guy.)than mine (my shoes are old worn and smelly.)Hope this boosts your confidence.Good hunting!
A
female
reader, Missesmidnight +, writes (11 November 2010):
Missesmidnight is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhat I meant by "fooling around with boys" is like I'm one of the guys. I'm frequently told by my guy friends that I'm different and easier to hang out with, versus the other girls at my school. They don't like the other ones because they talk trash and have no sense of spontaneity or fun. Which I agree.
Cerberus's definition is right.
Yet, I'm still a 'girly girl' in the sense of style and simple 'wants'.
I've never been one to click easily with other girls, most of my friends consist of guys that I like to hang out with.
And I've never fallen for a 'popular' guy in my life. I've only ever really liked a couple people, and they were not popular at all. They were the type that I could call my best friend, I could tell them anything and we'd have a load in common. Most of them weren't even that cute, I've never just fallen for looks.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): thewalkin'dude I assume she means getting up to mischief with them, in the sense of doing beer bongs, or throwing toilet paper on trees. If she means sexually fooling around them though you're right. This can be a huge hindrance.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): Seeing as you're "popular" the guys you've been with might have seen it as a challenge to get with you then got bored. Guys your age can be pretty immature and girls sometimes obviously. Do you go out with the "popular" guys? If so they usually just want a bit of arm candy not a serious relationship. You are very young to have had 4 relationships already, that is quite a lot.
What do you mean by "getting into a little trouble with the guys?" I hope that doesn't mean sleeping around because you will get a reputation and it will be even harder to find a decent guy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2010): No offence but "party girls" and girls that like to get in "trouble with the guys" aren't what a lot of guys consider relationship material. They're "good time" girls only out for excitement and fun, they can't sit still. You're relationships are short and boring because you don't want to settle into a relationship, you don't have time, you're too busy out there having fun. You need constant excitement and stimulation when you don't get that you go somewhere else where you can.
The problem with that is, when you meet a guy who wants to spend some time with you, you get bored you're probably texting your friends and what they're doing probably seems like way more fun. The guys you meet that you like are probably similar to you in that they too are popular, party boys and need to be social but guys like that are fickle and if they're popular will have other offers other girls they can go for.
This might sound strange but perhaps you make new friends way too easily and being popular you probably don't have to rely on people as much because you can always find others to hang out with.
Nothing I've said is a negative reflection on you as person, so please don't take it that way. I'm just stating that if you never stand still then how are you supposed to truly connect with a guy. A rolling stone gathers no moss. You probably get chatted up a lot by guys, but then you see something happening in the corner of your eye and you run straight over to join in. Guys probably don't get a chance to know you, because you always have to be somewhere, you're always doing something.
This isn't a bad thing at all. Life is about fun and it sounds like you're enjoying yourself. But next time you meet a guy who is interested in you. Hold yourself back from the socializing and partying a small bit and focus that little bit of extra attention on him instead.
Most of all remember, there's nothing at all wrong with you. You have a lot going for you. It sounds to me like you're a good person, a friendly person and a guy will come along who will take the time to get to know that but you have be there and let him, you have to give that person a little bit of extra time and not rather be somewhere else.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 November 2010):
 Maybe you need to look at the guys that you tend to fall for. It may the totally "wrong" type for you.
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