A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm making the decision today as to whether or not i will remain in my relationship.Over the past year and a half I've been involved with someone whom i thought i loved.She definitely cheated on me and there is plenty of evidence that she did so towards the beginning of our relationship (first 6 months).Since then i have not found evidence but i haven't built up the trust either. She stopped hanging out with her guy friends initially but started doing it again recently. I still have my doubts in her mainly because she denies to this day that she cheated on me although her hands are as red as Adolf Hitler's.Ever since i found out about her affair i closed the door to compassion and patience and replaced it with anger and vengeance. I'm more angry than anything else because vengeance is not something i tolerate but i understand it.I've tried getting revenge by flirting with a girl at work in hopes to get somewhere but i just couldn't do it. I actually admitted to my girlfriend that i tried getting revenge but that i couldn't go through with it because i sincerely love her and really wanted things to work.Just recently i lied to a really good friend of mine, kissed her, admitted i lied and lost her. We did nothing else, actually we both got wierded out and haven't spoken since.I don't like the person i have become and at this point i don't know if it's myself i have to blame or the woman who i feel is still hiding something from me.The answer is clear, i need to break this relationship off before someone gets hurt again ( I've been choked, punched, kicked, slapped and beaten with blunt objects.) My question: How do i break it off with someone who has serious emotional issues?
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affair, at work, cheated on me, flirt, girl at work, revenge Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Lilly Rose  +, writes (19 May 2009):
 Well firstly, her mental issues are not yours she has to deal with them herself, talk to her about them, try and get her help but only if she wants the help, then you need to run fast away from this relationship, why stay with someone who beats you and cheats on you? Don't say love as she can't love you! Why waste your happiness??? You really need to get out of this relationship or your be full of your own mental issue that your next current partner will have to deal with! You only have one life, so don't waste it on anger and hatred!
Good luck!
A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (19 May 2009):
 My friend, if there are no children involved...MAN UP AND LEAVE! If you are getting physical as well, it's uncalled for. And revenge cheating is an immature and selfish solution. It makes you no better than the original cheater and solves nothing.
You pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move on...
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A
female
reader, Briana969  +, writes (19 May 2009):
simple when shes out next pack you bags leave a note saying its over and go, its obvious that the relaitonship is doing both of u no good. it sounds like leaving while shes there is going to a lot harder than doing it when she isnt.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2009): Are you saying that SHE has choked, punched kicked,slapped and beaten you with blunt objects?
Are you serious? And your concerned that early on your relationship she may or may not have cheated on you???
You may need to get a restraining order out on the girl! She sounds dangerous. Women can be batterers too, and she certainly fits the description!
Answer to your question: VERY CAREFULLY!
You can't leave an abusive relationship the same way you would leave a normal one...trust me I know!
You have to have a plan in motion. You have to do it while they are not there to try and stop you!
Considering what you have told us in your post, you have made the correct decision to end it!
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