A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: If your partner/spouse of over 30 years with whom you had been very happy (most of that time) cheated on you emotionally and got close to someone else to confide in instead of you although declaring how much they love and always have loved you, would you be able to accept this and move on if their relationship was definately over due to you discovering about it?Thanks for your opinions.
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (28 January 2010):
I would find it very hard to accept. I think your husband needs to prove that he's worth a second chance. He only ended it because you found out, not because he did it by himself. So you both need to get to know each other all over again and really understand why this happened. Make him work for your forgiveness a bit.
A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (28 January 2010):
After 30 years of marriage, and my guy still loves me, but was "emotionally close" to another woman, spent time with her and shared his problems with her and is no longer in touch with her, (probably because I disapprove).
Hahaha... I'd be kissing him all over, I'd be celebrating my good fortune in finding a man who loves me, and has not physically cheated on me, and still wants to please me and make me happy. But that's me... I'm aware that human beings can love many people in many ways, I'm aware that human beings are not perfect, not the man, nor the woman.. I'm also aware that some women need perfection, and any problems no matter how small, is an excuse for them to end a long relationship, start a divorce and live alone until they find a man who is half as good as their present one and loves to abuse and humiliate them. I'm aware that some women are happy to make the man they love, sad, alone, and guilty, and are happy to continue a relationship where unhappiness is the main goal.
Don't forgive him, divorce him, feel hurt because your husband has been "talking to someone else".... do all this, and some other woman who has lower standards will be right there to give him comfort, unconditional loving, who will forgive him for many things he dose wrong, and love him until the day she dies... As I said, I suppose you'll find someone else who will probably be more perfect than the guy you've been living with for 30years.
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A
female
reader, CaliCal +, writes (28 January 2010):
A lot of men KNOW what "emotional cheating" is... but most of them will not admit it. 30 years is a long time to stick with someone. Congratulations! If you do research on the subject as I did... you will find that emotional cheating can lead to physical. Ask him to back off of this other woman.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2010): Not if it only ended because you found out about it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2010): My honest answer is that I would try to move on and continue the relationship as 30 years is a hell of a long time to throw away...
Everyone deserves a 2nd chance (within reason) and this is certainly within reason!!
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