A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:To start this off i am a very insecure person. when someone flatters me or compliments me its really hard to take it in because i just dont beleive its possible for me. Yesterday night I was hanging out with my boyfriend of two years and a half and one of his friends. They both decided they wanted to get drunk and i therefor ended up getting drunk with two guys (one i obviously love very much). The hole process was really weird because seeing my boyfriend this way (first time we got drunk together) ..it was just really weird? He kept touching my butt and saying how nice it is and how he wanted to have sex with me and he would grab my breasts...it was just a weird kind of approach since usually he does these things very anonymously. He even went so far to ask his friend if "isn't her a** the nicest thing you've ever seen?!".. it was disturbing and not at all flattering :S... I wasn't really in the right frame of mind to tell him something and i am not sure i want to approach him with the subject today. However, he did also say he loves me so very much and he wants to marry me someday and be with me forever...which he also tells me sober but then again i just don't believe someone would ever want to be with ME forever.. So, all in all, do people speak the truth when drunk and does him grabbing me all the time mean he wants me for sex only:S? I am very disturbed and confused about the whole situation and would just like some advice. Please share opinions and advice :)!
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female
reader, Emjo  +, writes (23 June 2009):
 I think he must have just felt a bit turned on after the drinks, a lot of boy, and girls do! Its just how it effects people, it makes them more confident and just because he's saying these things it doesnt mean he loves you any less and because he loves you he probably does have desires, hes showing you off to his friend! If anyone should be feeling really bad in this situation it would in fact be him! I mean he had to watch you be groped, thus feeling like a third wheel then had something he didnt and couldnt have dangled in his face the poor lad. I wouldnt let it get you down im sure your boyfriend loves you very much and i wouldnt let his drunken behaviour bother you in any way :)
And if it is still getting to you then i NEED to talk to him, explain that you felt the way he behaved was very inappropriate and you werent comfortable with it, im sure he'll understand and listen..
Take care x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): I'm extremely insecure && I know where you're coming from. I would personally take it as a compliment if I were you. I mean...he could have been saying those things about another woman. But since he was saying it directly to you, it should make you feel better.
When my boyfriend compliments me infront of his or my friends, I always get embarrassed because of my insecurities. Maybe the next time you both get drunk, you should do it alone. When my boyfriend && I smoke weed, he gets like that too with me. You might view it differently if you 2 were alone.
Does he also say things to you like this when you're sober? If so then i think he defiantly means it. So why not have some fun with it?
I hope i could help...
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