A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So i talked to this girl over the phone and she kept giggling and saying I'm cute. Then we met in person and she told me that i have a nice body and she told me I'm cute again. She was acting super nervous around me and said to me "Sorry for acting so weird". Then she asked me "Is it ok if I kiss you?" and a heavy make out session took place for about 40 minutes and then we had to part ways. When we were making out she asked me "Can you kiss my neck?" and then after that we went back to french kissing for the rest of the time. She told me that my kisses were really good. She even wanted to move to the shower to kiss and then she asked me if she can give me head and she started to go down on me while i was standing and she was making eye contact. What gets me though is she texted me after i left with a very short message saying "be safe" and i replied "thank you" and about 2 hours later she replied "no problem" and then i replied "thanks for a good time" and 4 hours later she just replied "Anytime. Take care of yourself"I usually have a problem with overthinking everything but i can't help but feel like she doesn't really seem that much into me over text. In person is a COMPLETELY different story though. She did keep trying to get me to talk about something interesting but since I'm very socially awkward i was a very interesting person to talk to. When we were making out she kept asking me if I'm enjoying myself. We were making out so long because that's what a wanted to do so she followed my lead. She would have done pretty much anything i asked.I basically really felt that she was just trying to please me.
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (9 July 2016):
 OP, what are you tryng to make me say :)? that's absolutely impossible that this escort found you attractive ?
Abd if I say that, you 'll go : aha ! gotcha. Give me proof.
I have no proof. I still happen to think that , if not impossible, it's highly improbable.
I cannot KNOW for sure , not knowing personally this girl or you.
I go by my gut feelings AND by what I know about the escort world , which, by curious coincidence, is a definitely not irrelevant quantity of info, although personally I have never been an escort nor had one in my family or close circle of friends :). But, how I got my
" inside edition " of the escorting business, is a very long story, although an interesting one, and I 'll skip it. Just remember that my comments aren't totally random, but based on actual ( although, of course , not unlimited by any means ) knowledge about the escorting business and its codes and general habits.
That prompts me to say that yes, I believe that if she had been particularly smitten with you- you would know by now.
Of course, it is still a personal, unverifiable opinion. It' s not like I or the other Aunt can give you any solid scientific evidence .
The same goes for your hunches, though- and we are back to square one. If you want to verify your guess- you'll have to stick your neck out and ASK her. Ask her out , in fact, or anyway ask her to see you without money transactions involved.
That's the only way you would know.
Therefore, either this is so important to you that you will find the courage to make this experiment, - or it is not and you can simply forget about it. You don't want to date her anyway, right ?- and as for your emotional / intellectual connection- we don't have just ONE soulmate, you know ?... There may be dozens of other girls from amy walk of life that you can relate to, and have a similar outlook on life to yours. You just have to circulate enough and get in touch with enough different kinds of people .
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAlso, what made me think there was a possibility that she was into me WAS NOT the words that came out of her mouth. It was Her body language towards me. Things such as the intense eye contact from the moment i walked in the door, her talking awkwardly nervous (not like what a person would sound like if they were on drugs), the tone of her voice when she said i was cute and had a nice body (I'll admit this particular thing could just be something she's good at), and also when i kept catching her staring at me when i peeked my eyes while we were kissing, it was like she couldn't stop looking at me and i remember feeling good about that :)Look i know that these women in this business are professional and make men feel good about themselves for a living. I can't remember everything from the session, but i remember feeling like she was showing legit signs that she could be attracted to me, going by her body language. I don't EVER pay attention to the words that women say when it comes to this kinda stuff because i know damn well that they are good at lying.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAunt honesty,At the time, before the session started I definitely didn't assume that the phone call was a sign she liked me. At THAT time however, i felt it was a positive sign that i could possibly warm up to her. BTW, i have NO doubt at all that she was genuinely laughing and DEFINITELY thought my personality was cute when i talked to her over the phone. When i walked into the room she had such an intrigued facial expression, and gave me the most intense eye contact i have gotten from a girl in a while. Now THAT could have been faked by her, there's no way to know for sure. I'm not gonna lie to myself and pretend that was genuine. That's why i ask you to trust me when i tell i know something for sure, like the fact that her she was being genuine over the phone. You cannot fake the laugh and tone of voice the way she did. I would bet my life on it. I know i know, that's not a sign she is attracted to me, it just felt good to hear :) Do you think she would have without a doubt called me if she was really interested in me? I mean wouldn't she wanna make sure that i was into her BEFORE she makes a bold move like casually calling me? The most important thing i want you guys to know, is that what i want the MOST from her is her feeling attracted to me. I couldn't care less about dating her, i would just be thrilled to know she likes me. As for WHY she got into this business? She needs fast money because we live in a very expensive area of California, she needs money for college because she wants to improve her life, and some other things.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (8 July 2016):
 The thing is though that you felt this escort liked you before she even set eyes on you, just over a phone call? She is well capable off trying to get a man feeling like he is wanted and special and one of a kind. Now am not saying that you are none of those things, I am just saying I think it is unhealthy for you to think so deeply about how an escort acted around you, after all she has had much practice. Just out of curiosity has she tried contacting you again? I think if you want someone you can date then an escort might not be the best of ideas, I mean you don't even know how she ended up being an escort, is she in debt? On drugs?
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCindyCares-I understand all of your points and i agree with them, I just have one question:To point number 4:Would a girl necessarily be that bold? I mean even an escort. Wouldn't it be more likely she's still a normal girl when it comes to liking a guy? What i mean is isn't it more likely IF an escort really liked a client, that she would still be nervous about making the first move and would want the MAN to do it? Do you really think that an escort that's not desperate would make the first move on the very first date?
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (8 July 2016):
Ok, I'll rephrase it :
Hope... one can always hope, against all odds. Hope is always allowed. Even for the most improbable,absurd things.
Then,though, generally we have to read a given situation and try to assess if our hope is grounded on something objective, something real - which makes what he whope for somewhat likely , or more likely , to happen- or if it is based on subjective perceptions and impressions (... or downright wishful thinking ) that may not have much to do with what is really going on.
Of course this is not an exact science. It's a matter of opinions . But since you asked for opinions ,- my personal opinion is that you are reading things the way you would like them to be, ignoring other more logical and possible explanations .
You took her acting nervous around you as a prof of attraction.
Not necessarily so :
1 ) As I told you already, you don't know this girl from Adam, you have no idea what's her normal behaviour. For all you know, she can be a highstrung type who acts like this around all new clients- or around all people , period. How would you know.
2 ) Obviously you dismiss what I say about the possibility of her being high on drugs. You should not- it's a distinct possibility. Many escorts use coke and other stimulants to go through their long workday - or worknight with similar effects to those you mention.
3 ) Nervous is also a big sign of " uncomfortable " and my guess is that you were making her uncomfortable. Think about it : she tries to make you talk, and to keep a conversation going- but you won't bite. Then she tries to turn you on, she gives her best to find out what arouses you and what makes you come- and you have eerction / ejaculation problems. Not your fault, of course- but enough to freak out also a seasoned escort. They do have a professional pride, like to know that they are doing a proper job - and fear that an unsatisfied client may badmouth them and lose them clients.
4 ) Escorts aren't shy, coy people, by definition. If she had thought you were something special,and that she just HAD to have a piece of you... she would have had no problem to invite you to come back , free of charge. Knowing that this is an offer than not many clients would say " no " to.
5 ) As you remark yourself, it's in an escort job definition, at least for the high end, costly ones, to make you feel good about yourself and make you feel that you are such a stud, the bee's knees. Some of them are very good at this, after all it's a performing job and they are born with, or cultivate, the talent to put on a convincing act. For instance : escorts TALK during sex- they'll compliment you for your prowess, your body, your stamina, your this your that - Well, when you realize that thay say these things several times a day, Sundays included, to different men- you may want to take whatever they convey , verbally and not verbally - with a big pinch of salt.
- The meaning you attach to the " be safe " text makes me think that maybe you are a bit of an overthinker and overanalyzer. When we look at things too close, we see them much bigger than we are in reality :)
But- does it matter at all btw ? I would think not. Didn't you just say you changed your mind and do not want to invest emotional energy into this girl ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCindyCares-
Why do you say this:
"Not saying that escorts cannot ever be attracted to their clients, I guess it happens some times, still I think you cannot assume this ( or even hope it ) based on what you tell us."
What is missing in my experience that you think I can't even hope that she is attracted to me? Please explain so i can be educated on this so i don't get my hopes up.
You don't think if she's acting nervous around me that it's not possible that it was because she's attracted to me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI change my mind. I'm not gonna bother investing myself into her. I have other options so I'll be ok. The only reason this girl stuck out to me is because we were so much alike that everything she talked to me about i related. It felt like she was a girl version of me.
Maybe i should have acted a little more interested in her conversation and sex. To be honest by the small chance she did actually like me, she would probably be wondering if i like her more than i am right now because i was so uninterested looking.
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female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (7 July 2016):
Frankly I think too that you are redaing volumes into this.
Not saying that escorts cannot ever be attracted to their clients, I guess it happens some times, still I think you cannot assume this ( or even hope it ) based on what you tell us.
- Why in the world should she ban forever you as a client if you tried asking her out ?
She is a professional. Business is business. Your feelings are YOUR problem, getting your money is her problem. I imagine she would just smile and say " Sorry, my strict policy is never to date my clients " or something equally diplomatic.
- The giggly and nervous thing: are you sure she was not on drugs ? Coke or some other stimulant ? Lot of drugs give you jitters - and the giggles. Unluckily, drug use is sort of an occupational hazard for escorts. It IS a stressful job from many points of view, and they often need " a little help from their friends "
- Then again, it's not clear to me if you know well this girl already, or if this was just your first encounter. In this last case, how would you know what's her normal usual behaviour ? Maybe she is just a strung up type - always.
- Don't embroider about the text either. She texted " be safe " ! How long does it takes , two seconds, 5, 10 ?
I can imagine perfectly that a client is not happy when his escort is minding her own business while he pays for having her full attention, then again such a short message can be sent while the new client is in the john, or taking his clothes off, or checking HIS phone. He would not even have noticed.
I think that you really should follow Aunt Honesty 's advice. No better way to know if yours was intuition or just wishful thinking.
And you are not risking . If she wants you, she'll tell you. But if she wants your money- she'll keep wanting it, don't worry.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAunt honesty,Actually the only reason i would never ask her out (unless she strongly hinted me to) is because if i show I'm interested in her on a romantic level and it turns out that she doesn't like me like that, then she'll pull away and never see me again as an escort/client relationship. It's not that i know "deep down", it's just I'm not willing to take that risk.I may be looking too much into it, you're right. However one thing is FORSURE. She was awkwardly nervous around me, and let me tell you she is the exact opposite of a shy girl. When i first walked in she was talking fast and she apologized for "being weird" as she put it. Then when i asked her to get in Cow girl position, she got in reverse cow girl and after a couple seconds of that, she said "why did i get in reverse cowgirl, you said regular cow girl huh" and she said that talking kinda quick and again she sounded nervous. Also, when she called me right before our session, she laughed at what i said in a VERY giggly matter and was like "hahahaha you're cute :)". Just in the tone of her voice I KNOW she had a smile on her face, it was THAT onvious. Also, as soon as i left i saw another client walk into her room but he didn't see me walk out. While she was with him, she texted me telling me to stay safe, when she had already told me before i walked out to text her when i get home so she knows i got home safe. One thing that you should know is that one of the BIGGEST pet peves clients have is when a provider they are with is texting on their phone, and this girl is VERY well known for her good service. I will admit though I'm really looking into everything because i do hope she likes me.To be honest, I don't even care whether or not she would date me. It would just feel really good to know that a beautiful escort who sees multiple men a day would fancy ME over the other men. Ya, I do have a big ego but i can't help it lol.
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female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (6 July 2016):
I just think you are reading to much in to it, you paid for her company and that is what you got, if you feel there is a genuine interest then ask her out on a date, but I know you are not willing to do that because deep down I think you know she will turn you down. There are lots of women out there you could date, so why a prostitute? Besides everything else, are you not afraid of catching something?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAunt honesty,
How come you think that? Do you think she wouldn't wanna give up a major source of income? Or is it because she would lose respect for me because I'm paying for sex? She is the only prostitute I've ever seen and the only reason i saw her is because i she is friends with someone i knew and it got out to all her friends and family that she is an escort. She doesn't know that i was friends with our mutual friend, and our mutual friend is dead so she would never find out.
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female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (5 July 2016):
I honestly don't think that an escort would date one off her clients, so if you where to go again and pay a second time well then I think it would be lessening your chances of actually going on a date with her.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo be honest i could really see us being a good match, infact i know we would be and i also strongly believe that there's a good possibility she digs me.
However, I'm well aware of the fact that it's just as possible that she just really wants my money.
Do you think that if she did see something in me, that it would take more than 1 session for her to consider going out on a date with me? Because this was the first time i saw her.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (5 July 2016):
Yes you where the only one that was there so you have to go by your gut instinct, but in my experience, these girls want there clients to keep coming back, so they need to be really good at what they do, now am not saying you are not good at picking up signs, I am just saying she is probably good at what she does.
Anyway if you feel there is a genuine interest, then why not ask her out, without having to pay this time, see what she says, you will have your answer then!
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes i paid for the date. However, I can easily tell when a girl is faking interest. I'm not relying on the text messages as a sign of her interest. I'm mainly going by her demeanor in person, which unfortunately only i can be the judge of since you guys weren't there.
I know when a girl has genuine interest in her eyes and when her laughter is genuine and trust me she had that look in her eyes. She was literally fixated on my eyes the entire time. I'm not talking about just casual eye contact either
She was acting awkwardly nervous and giggly too.
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female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (5 July 2016):
Did you pay her for this date? If the answer is yes, well then she is paid to do what it is that you want, she is paid to call you sweet names and the be safe text was to keep her in your mind so that you would come and visit again. Do you actually think you have a chance with this girl?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCindyCares,Yes of course she can't read my mind but i just meant that it looked liked she was trying to figure out what was pleasing to me. She just kept asking "Do you want this? Do you want that?"Do you think that she might have been trying to keep in contact with me by sending the first text message? She didn't need to because she already told me right before i left to call her to let her know that i got home safe. Then 10 minutes after i left she texts me "be safe".BTW i didn't tell you guys this before but this girl is actually an escort. I know you're gonna think "Well it's an escorts job to make you think that she likes you" but i really felt that by her demeanor to me in person showed that she liked me. She kept opening her eyes when we were making out to get a peak at me. I caught her a couple times.One thing you guys should also know, she is definitely NOT a good texter. What i mean is she always talks to people with short responses and a lot of the times she seems cold over text.
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female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (5 July 2016):
OP ! Of course she could not tell what was going on in your mind, she is not a mind reader , plus she barely knew you.
She saw you were not reacting physically as she would have expected, so she was trying to make sure that she did it
" right ".
You could have saved her the trouble and yourself the disappointment that transpires from your words by simply TELLING her : that you weren't too responsive because you were on pain pills which interfered with your erection / ejaculation.
It may be that this particular girl is a bit too eager too please, a bit insecure, ... I could not know. But let me assure that trying to find out what works sexually for a partner and what does not is just normal, standard procedure for almost everybody - and sort of authomatical when you see that things are not working too smoothly.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJust FYI we did start to have sex, but i was on pain pills so i couldn't keep the erection up or finish.
She kept asking me "Are you enjoying this?? Are you enjoying that??" It was really obvious that she couldn't tell what was going on in my head. She said she was sorry that i couldn't finish
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female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (4 July 2016):
She might not be to good at texting. Is it the first time you met? If it was then I would suggest slowing things down, if it was the first time and she was this forward then I would questions what it is she wants from you, maybe it was just a hook up in her eyes. It could also be that she feels you don't like her because you are not showing it. Talk to her and ask her what it is she wants. Ask her out on a date and get to know her personality.
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (4 July 2016):
 She likes you in a way that you can always meet up and have a good time. But if you are asking if she likes you romantically, I have doubts. She doesn't sound like someone who wants to settle down. She's pretty much carefree, living a hedonistic life in college. There's a chance that she may have some other guy she's doing this to. Most people would ask "where is this going? Are you single? What are you looking for" before even kissing. Maybe some people keep it quiet because they are afraid of scaring the other one off, or they want to keep that a mystery because that's what keeps the passion alive. If you care about your feelings and are concerned about being attached, then you have to talk about it.
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