A
male
age
30-35,
*ohndoe254
writes:I've got a long distance relationship with a girl. She has problems and is stressed so I asked if we could just be friends until I got stuff together to come down and be with her. But I made it clear that I wasn't going to cheat on her and she told me later that she just got a new bf. And that we're done. Is she just mad and probably wants to teach me a lesson or what? I would greatly appreciate it if anyone could help. Thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2009): JohnDoe254,
there are a couple of sides to this that spring out.
firstly - just talk to her, if she isn't interested then she isn't interested. Move on. Be her friend? but not more.
the new boyfriend thing, the hitting on friends is all saying she isnt interested to me.
the only way to find out is to ask her and be prepared for a fall. (sorry).
Star.x.
A
female
reader, Dazed~Confused  +, writes (18 March 2009):
 I think she is maybe trying to force your hand. And that in and of itself is a warning sign. If she's going to manipulate you to be with her, then you won't ever have a healthy relationship.
You say she has problems and issues to work out, well let her. You were kind and willing enough to be honest with her and not make promises that you weren't ready to keep, and therefore gave her the option to move on should she so choose. She made her choice, and you probably dodged a bullet.
She sounds like she is the type of person that needs to be with someone, which means that you would be carrying a lot of responsibility in that relationship, essentially being responsible for her happiness. You don't need that.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2009): lol i think she is just mad and upset and probably just teaching you a lesson and to see if you really care, tread lightly.. ask who he is, how long etc and if she really truely does have a new g/f, then cut all contact with her untill she contacts you (GO NC - GOOGLE NC AND WHAT YOU CAN DO TO APPLY TO YOUR SITUATION )..this may take weeks months years..who knows.. but if she is lying then go see her and talk to her face to face... sit her down and say that you love her but want whats best and if that means fixing yourself first then so be it... remember.. in order to love someone else you must love yourself first :)
goodluck
tim
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A
male
reader, Johndoe254 +, writes (18 March 2009):
Johndoe254 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJust found something out she is now hitting on one of my buddies that I know in real life
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