A
female
age
30-35,
*ennaf65
writes:So ive been seeing this guy for 5 months now. Things started off great, he would contact me every day and we would see eachother every few days. We admitted feelings for eachother, but he also told me he hasn't had a girlfriend in 4 years and the last girl broke his heart. He told me he in insecure with himself and wants to change. After 2 months, he told me he saw a future with me. He then stopped contacting me. I was hurt and confused but didn't chase after him. 2 months later, he started talking to me again. He said he got really scared and didn't know how to handle it and that he stil liked me and even drove by my house a few times because he missed me so much. He has told me that he likes it when a girl will tell him where they stand and everything but im used to men pursuing me for a relationship. I have also had bad relationships and I have had a very hard time opening up my feelings to him and have yet to tell him how much I really do want this to work, but I'm worried about scaring him away. The last time we saw eachother he told me he wants to date me. He told me he has a lock around his heart and it needs to get cracked open, and now once again he hasn't been talking to me first, I have been initiating contact. Does he want me to take the lead and chase him? Or is it hopeless expecting that this could actually lead to a relationship? Please don't give me the "he's using you for sex" we haven't done anything more than kissing. Thank you
View related questions:
insecure, kissing Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Philips  +, writes (15 May 2011):
 Sometimes when a guy propose a girl and she accepts, their may be a posibillity that she accepted because she couldn't say no, or out of pity. So, the guy would think to have found his soul mate and the girl wants to find a way to end it all. However, if a girl proposes then you can be sure she really wants to be with guy (Whatever her reasons may be).In your case, its does not seem about chasing him, because he already likes you and wants to be with you. So, maybe you should take matters in your hand and officially propose him. I bet he will not reject you.However, keep in mind that after you become a couple, he should not take you for granted. Because that's what usually happens when a girl starts doing everything a guys wants. So, you need to keep a good balance in your coming relationship, whereby he should make an effort as much as you do to keep the relationship healthy.
A
female
reader, IAMDONE +, writes (15 May 2011):
It does appear that perhaps he does want you to pursue him when he said that his heart has a lock on it. It might have been good idea if you had told him right then and there to call you when he decides to unlock his heart because you are looking for a healthy relationship that allows interaction that is conducive to building a great relationship. Unlocking a heart is an individual choice not a task for a girlfriend or someone he dates to have to unlock. Please...ain't nobody gonna Chase him down and then work to remove some DAMN lock.It is my understanding that men like to pursue and Chase...I am not saying play hard to get by any means. I am saying enjoy a relationship...don't look for one you have to jump thru hoops to unlock a heart.Your heart is open and now it is time for him to open his heart...not time for you to unlock it sweetheart!
...............................
A
female
reader, IAMDONE +, writes (15 May 2011):
It does appear that perhaps he does want you to pursue him when he said that his heart has a lock on it. It might have been good idea if you had told him right then and there to call you when he decides to unlock his heart because you are looking for a healthy relationship that allows interaction that is conducive to building a great relationship.
...............................
|
