A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:ok heres my problem, i have known this guy friend of mine for five years and we have always been just friends but, he is the sweetest thing such a gentleman always bought me presents never asked for anything in return. we lost contact for a couple of years but i always heard he was well.everyone who new us both always said he was crazy for me but because i was married at the time, he kept his distance out of respect. im divorced now and we linked back up and it was so exciting i felt like a teenager again he texted me day and night and we saw each other everyday. we only spent a week together but i think i fell for him. he says the sweetest things. ok problem, after a week with him he told me his father was ill and he needed to go and take care of him in mississippi, he told me he could not leave me so he wouldnt stay long, he wants me to visit. but here is the problem after he got to mississippi, he texted me and told me he made it and he missed me already, then he texted me the next day and asked how i was doing. ok i know this is a long question but i need to get the facts out. my problem is i miss him so much but he doesnt text like he use to, i try not to think about it but he stays on my mind why doesnt he text like he use to. and whenever i text him first he says hey baby i miss u glad u texted me, and when i tell him i'll text him later he says no baby dont leave me i miss u. im so confused should i believe him when he says he misses me why wont he text me like he use to. am i being selfish and inconsiderate of his dutys to his father i just really like him alot and i miss him .so confused
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female
reader, Auntie E +, writes (20 October 2011):
 Yes you are being selfish and inconsiderate. He's there to take care of his ill father! Good grief woman you sound like a 14 year old. Get down to Mississippi now! Clearly he want's to be with with you. Haven't you ever noticed how much time/energy it actually takes to text. Pick the phone up and CALL HIM - tell him you love him. Stop with all the texting nonsense! TALK. HAVE A REAL CONVERSATION.
A
male
reader, bmt1380 +, writes (19 October 2011):
As a guy, i know there have been times in relationships when i havent been as attentive as i had been in the past and it more often than not was due to me just being busier than normal. taking care an ill person is very time consuming and exhausting. i know if i was him in that situation i would appreciate the relaxation and distraction of you texting. by you texting, u are showing him u care and it sounds like he is doing his best to let you know he cares about you as well. i know it doesnt feel like its enough from him but with everything else on his plate right now u just get lost in the noise (so to speak). go visit him, and just be patient i think you will be pleasantly surprised in the end result
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A
male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (19 October 2011):
 it sounds like he has a lot on his mind right now with his father . he may have a lot of concerns right now ,things may not be good with his dad right now. sounds like he maybe overloaded right now. it does not sound like he has lost interest or anything like that, just that he may have a lot going on right now , emotionally . you may need to just call him and tell him you care for him and love him , and ask about his dad , and how he is holding up. and tell him to call you . plus let him know that you are their for him.
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (19 October 2011):
 Talk to him. We can't read his mind, this is best for you two to figure out amongst yourselves.
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