A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm sorry this is long but I needed to say it all.. please help and answer only if you read it all. Thanks so much :)After 2 years of a wonderful relationship my boyfriend broke up with me because he felt we needed space and time to figure out what we want in our lives. I am 19 and he is 20. Basically, the last 2 months or so of our relationship had been hell. We fought a lot and it seemed like it kept getting worse. But this was our only series of problems in our whole relationship. So, we broke up. and I was really devestated. He told me he was still in love with me and that he j/felt like we needed to do this for the good of relationship. He said he wanted to get back together and thought we would. He said a couple of months to get everything together in our lives is a small price to pay for a lifetime of happiness. So we talked the next two days after the break up and he was super sweet and very loving. I felt good about thedecision and agreed we needed to do it. However, 3 weeks passed w/out hearing anything from him. And we had plans to hang out in that 3 wks and I never heard a thing. So at that point I felt like he was j/letting me down easy and needed closure. I called him and he apologized for not calling but said he felt that if he did he would get too upset and wasn't ready. He said the same things he saidwhen we broke up about loving me. He said he couldn’t give me closure bc it’s not over for him. So we hung out a couple of days after we spoke.. the meeting was really good and positive. We both opened up and he got really emotional. He held my hand while we were talking and kissed me when we left.. he called me that evening and we talked more on the phone and he told me he loved me. We decided to talk once a week to keep contact... During the week I felt upset about him being gone and texted him to say I missed him. He never texted back. And then.. on the day before it was a week since we last talked I had not heard anything from him. So I texted him to ask if he even got the text I sent earlier in the week and if we're going to speak for our weekly thing. He texted back and apologized for not texting back earlier in the week and said he still wantd to talk and said he'd call me the next day. Well.. he did. And he seemed sort of distant.. not necessarily in a bad way but just not "lovey". He j/seemed closed off. I felt weird by it and couldn't help but ask why.. he said the same thing he's always said since we broke up: that he's still in love with me but thinks we need time. He said he wants usto get back together but doesn't think it's right right now and wants to take this time to make sure. He told me he can't promise anything but that he loves me. He isn't asking me to waitaround for him but gets jealous when I mention another guy. Also-- his mom emailed me last week and told me she misses me and hopes we can work it out and get back together. She says that he felt like he had to fit into my world and he wanted me to be proud of him all the time but it was getting harder for him. Any thoughts?
View related questions:
broke up, get back together, jealous, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, hailey_heartbroken  +, writes (5 May 2009):
are you two completely different people for him to think...he had to fit into your world and he wanted you to be proud of him???Maybe he does think that but you should tell him, you deserve to be happy too and although being without him is hurting you, being strung along is hurting you too. Once you reach this stage in your relationship it usually is the make or break of it...i know its hard and i no u love him but its time to move on for both of you by the sounds of it, avoid contact by any means for a few months and then agree to meet up in a few months for a drink and see what happens then..if its meant to be you will get back to gether...sometimes if you love someone enough you have to learn to let them go
|
