A
female
age
30-35,
*ulu31
writes:Hi lovely Cupid’s,I’m wanting some advice on some awful events that have happened in my family the past month. My grandad sadly passed away recently and he was the absolute backbone to our family. I have siblings and due to our parents alcohol addiction since we were very young, we ended up being very close to our grandparents. I thought the absolute world of him, and my nannan and him were so in love. They had been together 65 years. I live away, my brother lives in Thailand and my sister lives close to my grandma. Throughout my grandad being very poorly, my mum wasn’t about and left everything for us to sort out. Me and my sister had to sort out funeral arrangements and she had to sort all the bills etc because she lives close and it’s almost expected of her..which isn’t fair and it adds so much pressure on her.I am so stressed right now, amongst dealing with the loss of my wonderful grandad, I’m also beyond worried about my nannan and how lonely she must be and how lost she will be feeling, along with the anger for my mum letting her children pick up the pieces…and then feeling guilty that because I live on the other side of the UK I won’t get to visit my grandma that often.Does anyone know any good ways of handling the stress of grief? The more I think about all this, the more I feel like I’m going to have a breakdown. I haven’t been eating or sleeping properly for weeks and I just don’t know how things will get better.
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female
reader, Tinacandida +, writes (10 August 2021):
 So sorry for your liss. You could ring your grandma on a regular badis, you could reminisce and ask how shes getting through each day. See what would help. You may feel better knowing how she is coping. I know many ladies who have list their husbands and they cope really well and seem to accept their new lives. Your grandmother has always been there for you and will have the wisdom to carry you through these times and you will help the same way. You can then arrange to meet up and spend some time together.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2021): I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mum 19 months ago and I found that swimming got me through that. Just going to the pool, swimming a bit on my own and then sitting in the sauna for a while. You can cry in a pool and none can see your tears. I know it's more difficult now with covid but perhaps going for a walk each day and having some time alone to allow your thoughts to clear would help. Its horrific but it does get easier with time, I promise. As for your nan, call her regularly. She will understand you have your own life to live as well.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (24 July 2021):
 I'm so sorry for your loss. Your grandad held the family together and the best tribute you can pay to him is to be strong and take over where he was forced to let go.
The only thought which came to mind while I was reading your post was whether it would be possible for you to have your nana come and stay with you for a while?
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