A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I been with my boyfriend for 2years and i have discovered some devastating things about him. Sometimes I wonder does he love me, he says he does but his actions say otherwise. Here is the problem the first incident is when i found a sex website with my bf sayin he has a g/f but is lookin for a fling but he loves me alot and wants no strings attached... that made me furious and i confronted him about it he said he was upset with me and went and did it out of anger and promised he would never do it again. 2nd incident i found emails back an forth to a girl talkin bout meeting up for a anything goes date and i cried for 3 days but confronted him he said that he was being stupid and just was trying to see if he can pull this girl. 3rd incident i seen messages on yahoo messengers from all kinds of different gurls talkin bout sex and meeting up.. At this point i felt stupid, sad mad, and clues all at the same time.. He cried and said forgive him he was jus being flirty and tryin to make friends... I dont know what to do or think but i wanna believe he loves me and he say its nothing but stupid internet stuff that will never happen but i dont know.. I have no evidence of him actually cheating on me but i some times wonder has he or do he want to... PLEASE HELP ME!!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2006): How would he like it if you did the same? I reckon you should do the same ha ha!! Pin posters up of hunky men, browse the net and get chatting on line to men, leave messages in you inbox so your b/f will read!! Yea go on, he'll be laughing on the other side of his face...
A
female
reader, camille  +, writes (1 June 2006):
 He may love you but his actions are disrespectful and you don't deserve it. Whether he would have cheated or not before you confronted him is irrelevant now, because he did it. That is not your fault. He is responsible for his own actions. Don't beat yourself up over it. People hide behind computer screens and live out fantasies but if you're not happy with that (and I'm sure there's many who share that with you!) then you have every right to say that it's not acceptable. Things may start out as what he calls harmless flirting, but computers make it easier to take it a stage further and before you know it, things can get graphic. It's dangerous territory. Maybe ask him why he felt the need to do it and what's missing from his life. Don't assume that this is your fault. He must take responsibilty and any blame is certainly not yours. BUT...... in future think twice about snooping or perhaps if you don't trust him, ask yourself why and assess whether he's really the man for you after all........
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2006): Hun, you are really better off without this guy. Even if what he says is true, and he hasn't yet physically met up with anyone (which I find unlikely), then his behaviour is still unacceptable. And why would he do these things if he was happy and fulfilled in your relationship? He isn't babe, and as hard as that is to accept, you have to ask yourself if you want to be with a guy that doesn't really want to be with you. There are many, many men out there who will love and respect you and ONLY you, men you won't have to share. Cut your losses with this deadbeat and focus on building up your own self worth. Good Luck xx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2006): He was only trying to make friends? Only trying to see if he could pull 'this girl'? Pull the other one...he is after some no strings attached sex that he thought you'd never know about cos he was in the house the whole time he was arranging his 'anything goes' dates. What a SCUMBAG! You should leave this guy. His using you as his doormat and if he hasnt already cheated, he soon will.
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A
female
reader, Anja +, writes (1 June 2006):
 He has already cheated on you in his heart for sending and recieving flirty messages. This guy wants the stability of a relationship with regualr sex, but wants a bit of fun on the side. Even if he is not having physical reltions with anyone else, he is still CHEATING you of a secure and trusting relationship. Do you want to put up with this? If you do he will destroy your confidence and it will take you a very long time to trust anyone again and be in a relationship.
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