A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been married to my husband for 7 years although we have lived together 15 years now. Over the past few years he has been having an affair and has been back and forward to this woman several times. At the moment he is back with me he was with her for about 11 months but was trying to win his way back with me during most of that time.I know he has had no conact with her for several weeks now and i felt that he was really trying to get things back on track this time but i have just heard that he was speaking to one of her friends the other day and had enquired how she was he also said that he would have liked nothing better than to be going home with them that night but he had made his bed now so would have to lie in it and if it hadn't been for a particular problem in their relationship he would have still been there. I would hate to think that he is regretting his decision coming back to me.I think he is torn by the two of us but this just can't go on any longer. Do you think he is about to start up the relationship with her again and was sending a message to her?
View related questions:
affair Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2009): I feel so sorry for you as I am in the same place as you, I know there is still contact between my husband and his lover of 8 months. Wish someone could offer both of us some really good advice, but we both know that whatever we do it has to be our decision.
A
female
reader, Libra1963  +, writes (18 January 2009):
 Men you carry on like this often end up with no one. How many more years are you going to put up with this. I am speaking from similiar experiences, I wasted 10 years and was made to feel so cheap, worthless and unloved dispite having two small children. I ended up working with the other women so it was awful. I spied on them and alsorts.
I eventually was able to cut his off and developed a new relationship. Soon he was trying to rekindle as she had had enough of his as well.
Its your decision. You know him best but dont waste to much time worrying. Spend more time being happy. Life is so short.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2009): There is absolutely no point in asking him outright because he has a degree in lies! He has told so many recently im disgusted and im beginning to think i have never really known him.
...............................
A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (17 January 2009):
 It's possible that he may be trying to rekindle things with her and he probably feels he can because he's done it before and you have tolerated it. I guess the only way your going to know is to ask him outright.
The way I see it you have two choices. You either stay with him and put up with the suspicion and worry, or you give him an ultimatum that things have to stop with his cheating. Its really sad that he is doing this to you but truth be told, a lot of men do and it's normal behaviour to them.
I really feel for you, it must make you feel terrible and maybe you should start thinking about how you can build yourself up and be happier.A self confidence class or assertiveness. Maybe it will give you the strength to either tackle him over this or to walk away for good.
Bless you hunny, I hope you find a way through xx
...............................
|
