A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I've made a decision to NOT get involved with a man who I am attracted to at work, and he's attracted to me as well. Do you believe that it is possible for us to continue to work at the same place and just remain co-workers? Do you think these feelings will pass with time?
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (18 May 2008):
 As long as you know your limits and boundaries and you don't cross the line,
you should let your friendship flourish.
You need friends at work and it defies logic if you just give each other the cold shoulder.
If you know you are still in the driver's seat,
you will be o.K
A
female
reader, MOLLY ANGEL +, writes (18 May 2008):
I read your question and I'm in the same situation.I would love to correspond with You,because maybe We can help each other
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A
female
reader, Artistry +, writes (6 May 2008):
 Hi, Alright, so now we have clarifacation of both your situations. Stop it with the messages, stop parking your car next to his, if I may advise you. What you are doing is flirting with fire. Think about this, if you both decide to have some kind of physical contact and it grows, emotions can get out of control, so to speak, what then? How many people would you be hurting, would you want your husband to start flirtibg, possibly going further, and you find out about it. How would you feel about that? Control yourself, before you get into a place where you might not want to go. Remember your vows, this is how divorces eventually come about. Now, if you want to risk your marriage, your job, your friends, because your women friends won't trust you, if you act on this, they will wonder if their husband, might be your next conquest. All these things are hypothectical, but if you continue on this path, you are jeophardizing your future and the very life that you have made for yourself. Think, not to be preachey, but what are you setting yourself up for, suppose you start the fire and he refuses to leave his wife and family. You may not have a husband, a job, friends or your self-respect. Think, it could save you from yourself, Is the temporary fire worth it, when you wind up, burning down the house? :o). Take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your feedback, and all of it makes sense. We are both married so this attraction is really a forbidden thing. He still lets me know he thinks about me, and I have the desire to let him know as well but I'd be the bad guy if I did this because he has a new baby (on top of everything else!), and I'm afraid my job would be at risk, although there's other foolin' around at work.
I'm thinking about parking my bus next to his tonight, he'll know I'm thinking about him then, as he parked his bus next to mine last Friday to let me know he would be thinking about me all weekend (when we don't work). He is very protective of me so if I park my bus next to his what could be wrong with that, Huh?? It's sending him a message and not hurting anyone else. Neither of us seem to plan on acting out our feelings, but it's really difficult to just ignore each other altogether. What do you think? If we don't see each other after a day it makes us crazy. If we do see each other it's awkward - a no win situation.
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A
female
reader, Artistry +, writes (5 May 2008):
Hi, You do not sy ifnthe two of you are single or not, so we will go on the assuption that you bothare availble. What are you company policy rules? If office involvement is frowned upon for obvious reasons, you would have to be very discreet, if you got involved. Next you have to think about the possibility of the romance not working out, how would you feel if you broke up and he started dating someone else
who worked there? There are a lot of pitfalls. Be aware.
Folks have gotten married from office romances, I think the most famous one would be Bill Gates and his wife,if I am not mistakened. But be careful, make sure you think you know what you are doing, read the beginning of this sentence again. This could be tricky, emotions are very
strange, you don't want to risk your job. Then again, discretion is the better part of valor. Take care and think hard. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2008): I dont think it is appropriate. It will cause only trouble if one acts upon it.
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A
female
reader, DevilsApprentice42  +, writes (5 May 2008):
 You only live once, I say if you dont act on your feelings now, you two are gonna be talking by the printer one day and then out of no where...BOOM...sexual outburst...Ive seen it before...just tell him how u feel and have great sex. You will feel better. =D.
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A
female
reader, :):):) +, writes (5 May 2008):
Speaking from past experience, it is possible to work with someone who holds a mutual attraction for you. Sure, it may a little awkward at times but it shouldnt cause any real problems.
Unless your workplace has strong ethical codes of conduct and frown upon coworkers dating then you shouldnt worry.
Why did you decide not to get involved? If you're both single, lifes too short to miss opoortunities afterall!
Good luck
xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2008): Of course, our concscious decisions made by the gray matter between our ears is what seperates us from the animals....we can control our actions, our feelings, our wants and desires, it's called having integrity and self control.
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A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (5 May 2008):
 Just because you have feelings you do not have to act on them. If you are both single then I dont see a problem - sure it may not work out but life is for living - unless there are strict rule about this sort of thing at your work. If one of you or both of you are in a relationship or married then you have to make the decision that it cannot go any further but be mature enough to cope with this and move on x
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