A
female
age
41-50,
*ovedup08
writes:do people think that 25 years is too big an age gap? I am engaged to my boyfriend who is 25 years older than myself. My only problem is my mother does not approve. I just want to see what other people think as I would like to be able to see it from my parents point of view.
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female
reader, ~Cherry7*up~  +, writes (10 September 2008):
 Age is just a number if you really love this man then age shouldnt matter..there are ppl out there who have an even bigger age gap...But they are still together bcuz of the fact that they love and adore eachother beyond what others think about the age diffrence
A
female
reader, desperate_angel +, writes (1 September 2008):
 its not a problem girl as long as you like/love each other why not. and especially if you could still bear a child from him then go. Goodluck
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2008): If this is your first relationship, I would put off marriage for awhile. If you have had other relationships with men your own age and have still decided to be with this guy after knowing him for at least two years, then yours is probably a healthy relationship. having been with an older man myself for eight years of my life, I just want to say that I never felt freer in my life than the day I left him. he was very controlling anyway, but I felt like being tied to someone his age was really making me miss out on a lot in life. and men age fast when they reach a certain point. the last year or two I was with this guy, he aged like fifteen years. you may feel guilted into caring for him the rest of your life. don't want to be a downer, but having been there and now having a wonderful relationship with someone who is still older, but closer in age, I think you should listen to your mother. you didn't give too many details about your relationship, maybe it's great, but I don't think it's a good idea to get married before your family is ready. to me, marriage is a joining of families, and if your mother is uncomfortable, then there will be tension throughout your whole marriage.
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A
female
reader, Lovedup08 +, writes (1 September 2008):
Lovedup08 is verified as being by the original poster of the question THanks to everyone that has replied to this, I am really greatful and its nice to see not everyone thinks it is wrong xx
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (1 September 2008):
 Darling there are two sides to a coin.
The first side is you are of child bearing age. Does your man have any children? If so does he want to be a father again in the future? Has he already been married and would he want to get married again if he already has in the past?
Your parents may want to have grand children, or your father may want to walk his daughter down the aisle. If you do get to have children, will he be willing to play football or any other sport with them, as you get older your body gets much slower and more tired.
The other side of the coin is Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones has exactly the same age gap as you guys and are married with two lovely children. So there is hope.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2008): No,I don't.As you already know from everyone's view,and I'll
give mine myself.AGE DOESN'T MATTER!It's just a number and
if you truly love eachother,then age shouldn't even be thought of.If your mom doesn't approve,then tell her that she will just have to get used to it because you two will not aplit up because of people's opinions.I hope we all helped you in some way.
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A
female
reader, ItsEmma +, writes (1 September 2008):
 Don't worry about your mom; mom's worry about everything. (: I agree with someone below me, though. Consider what it'll be like 10, 20, even 30 years down the road. If you still want to be with him after that, then go for it. Whatever makes you happy. (:~Emma
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A
female
reader, epifanatical  +, writes (1 September 2008):
 age is just a # sweetee.. i was involved with a guy who was 30 years older.. we lasted 4 years.. but in the end we did get together for all the wrong reasons..
what i will say is this.. older guys tend to be a bit more controlling than guys your age.. they cant help it really its just the way they are and the era they were brought up in.. so i strongly advise you to sit him down and talk about things.. tell him you respect him and love him but you also need to be your own person too.. and ask how he feels about that.. my ex was very controlling.. he usually made all the decisions.. and it left lil else for me to do..
you must have this talk BEFORE you guys commit.. dont make the same mistakes i made.. also check out when you are out together.. is he comfortable being seen with you?.. is he openly affectionate?.. does he hold your hand ?.. my ex felt embarresed!! true! he imagined people would think we were father-daughter instead of lovers.. so find this out also.. its very important you talk about what you want and how you feel and him the same.. this is nessassary to avoid conflicts later.. i wish you the very best for both of you .. and dont worry.. if you really love each other age shouldnt matter.. the sex is usually better too !! :)
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A
male
reader, Collaroy +, writes (1 September 2008):
 Hi,
this is an age old question. True love often conquers all, but in 10 years time when you are in the prime of your life your partner will be at retirement age. These are things you really need to think about and it is natural for your parents to be concerned about you dating a man who is so much older than you.
But you are a grown woman and entitled to make your own decisions, but be realistic about where you will be in the future - as I think that is what will concern those who love you.
good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2008): age is just a number if this gut makes u happy and you dont care about the age gap then niether sould your parents they should be happy for you its not about other people accepting the age gap its about you and your partner accepting it . your old enough to make your own choices and if that means making mistakes aalong the way you will learn by them.
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A
female
reader, Aunty Em +, writes (1 September 2008):
 Me and my partner have a 23 year age gap, and we work just fine. As I am sure you and your partner do. If you are in love, does anyone else matter? Although, I can see the difficulty - especially when it's your mother's opinion. They are, important to a most girl's hearts. But, I imagine you've explained to her that your partner makes you happy, and surely that's all you and your mother want for yourself in life? Enjoy what you have. Don't let other people make it hard for you.
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