A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ONE SIMPLE QUESTION:DO LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS (LDR) WORK?answer however you like.. yes, no, youre opinions or experiences etc. anything would be helpful! thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2010): LDR is an issue with all different perspectives... but you have to look at the positive things rather than the negative... if you look at the negative too much then the relationship will surely crumble... be open in the relationship, commit, and be strong
A
female
reader, taysha1  +, writes (20 July 2009):
I'm in the first month of my first LDR and its hard but i believe that it will work out. We are so in love with each other and we've figured out ways to stay in touch and keep up to date with each others lives - we skype most days, email and call. it really is important to us that we have contact each day which i think helps a lot.
We're apart due to travelling - i'm away for 6 weeks, then he goes away for the rest. when he's away he wont be near a computer or have a phone so it'll get harder but i know we'll cope.
I sent him a little gift basket the otherday and i can't wait to find out when he gets it. - all his favourites, red wine, chocolate and cheese (easily pleased). I get butterflies when i think of him and want this to work out more than anything.
thanks for letting me share my thoughts - its hard when you're travelling alone in country where you can't really understand the language!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2009): For me, no. I was in a couple when I was younger. One ended because my ex-bf impregnated another woman and married her. The other ended because when I finally met and got with the guy who I thought was so perfect on the other end of the phone/computer, it turned out he was a controlling jerk. And it didnt help that there were men who were local to me who were showering me with affection.
I'm a woman who needs physical contact with my man. Maybe that's just me, but I need to see him, touch him, caress him, kiss him... and whatnot. Anything else is just talking and I can do that with my sisters or my friends. But, hey, that's just me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2009): They can work, but require alot of effort. LDR going more then 12 months is due to fail, 80 percent! however if you are succesfull then count yourself lucky.
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A
female
reader, SugarCookie  +, writes (17 February 2009):
Yes it can work. My fiance and i were together for 4 months before i moved away and we spent 2 1/2 years apart on the phone everyday. We have no been living together a 1 1/2 and are very happy we lasted through the seperation. It just takes a lot of work.
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A
male
reader, feeling_sad  +, writes (17 February 2009):
yes it can work but only if both sides fully agree the reasons for having a LDR....and that your goals for the relationship is shared and agreed between you both. the biggest problem with LDR is that people change their goals even if their feelings may stay the same....and communications starts breaking down and people start diverging what they think of their relationship....i have learnt the hard way....i am starting again
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A
female
reader, febbyfebby  +, writes (17 February 2009):
i think it might be work, i ever experienced that, 1 year in LDR. nothing changed my feelings until he back, the most important thing when he back is the all first time kisses and romantic things u did beofre seems like new.
we also had quarrels, lonely times,sadness when things happen and u feel like want to be hugged but no one there, but it's in you. you cant be depend on anyone rite? sumtimes u have to be strong.
sure u need also to have hobbies or things to do,hang out, etc. coz when ure in a LDR, sumtimes ur txt cant be reply ASAP coz he's busy and everything. ur calls mayb not answered coz he's not nearby the cell, but positive is the key. dont think he's messing around with others.
keyword : trust and commit that's all.
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A
female
reader, This_face  +, writes (17 February 2009):
Long distace relationships can work, but they are not easy. LDR take a lot of trust, communication, ability to be apart and the possibility of a future together. A LDR is something that should take foundation as being temporary. A LDR should also be done only if a strong relationship exists. It also means the couple will need to decide what their relationship entitles and how they see their future. If all of these are possible then a LDR can work from what I've heard and seen. For example, if your long time boyfriend is going to live hours away for work for the summer or for the year or whatever it could work. However, if you meet a nice boy while on vacation miles away from home and then decide to go out after the vacation is done that might not work so well. Or, if you are the type of person who needs the other person there a lot and you require the comfort of sight it might not work.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009): Yes they do. these days its a lot easier - the internet, skype, Mobiles. Distance isn't what it was. You have to adjust and enjoy the moments you have together more than anything. (Warning rubbish analogy coming up) be like a camel and every meet up is your oasis, you have to drink your fill of sex, intimacy, love etc before heading over the desert to the next meeting. Hugs Star.x
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A
male
reader, anoms +, writes (17 February 2009):
 personally..not really, in my experience everything can be going absolutly fine and with no warnings the attraction to another can readily escalate, just because of the lack of physical attention alone, even though the person in question may feel very loved the lack of physical presents just seems to leave an open void, well hope this helps, gudluk.
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A
female
reader, wonderingcat +, writes (17 February 2009):
 I was in a long distance relationship for 2 years (we had to be in separate countries, after being together for 2 years before that). It did not work because in the end, we had both settled in our dream jobs (at the time) ... but we are still very good friends now (and spookily maintain telepathic connections). 10 years and (1 other b/f later), had another LDR, that did not work either. Two friends of mine had LDR throughout their college years. and got married when both finished college. 20 years later, they are still married. They were faithful to each other (and celibate of course) but that did not mean that any one of them forgo living and enjoying life in general :-) There is no recipe for how to make it successful. Only you and your LDR partner would be able to sort out. It is difficult, and could be expensive, mind you, especially when you need and want warmth "in the flesh" LOL In my and my friends' cases, we often went out as groups (even to parties) therefore we sort of reminded each other that we already had made long-term committment with our respective partners. When we went out with guys on dinners, or coffees, or movies, or plays, we just did not treat it as a "date", and we told the guys we went out with as such, up front. Good luck with your LDR!
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