A
female
age
30-35,
*twinklex
writes:As I've said in another question, I've been with my current boyfriend for about 3 months now.Like quite a lot of people I'd assume, he's been in his fair share of trouble. About 6 months ago he finished a 12 month prison sentence, and has since been on a 12 month probation order, which has many terms and conditions.Problem - He's been re-arrested due to a violation of his probation terms. (A violation that actually didn't occur)I've been spending so much of the last 3 months in his company and for the last three weeks he's been back in prison and I feel lost without him. Not in a clingy, my life is over kinda way - I still do the same stuff as before (uni, out with mates, pub etc) so don't think I've suddenly become a crazy recluse or anything lol - but it just feels like a big chunk of me suddenly missing.Now I know it's ONLY 3 months, but it's been a great 3 months. What's hurting so much right now is that, 1 - he's not here and I miss him and his company and the things we do and 2 - if its this bad now, if he's in for 4 more months (which could happen) how am I gonna cope then? So the question is, after only 3 months.. do I wait for 5 months? What if he gets bored of me.. as I won't be able to physically BE with him? What if he doesn't WANT me to wait? He'll have been gone LONGER than we've been physically 'together' - is that weird? Obviously, right now, there's no doubt in my mind about it but, how do we stay...i guess 'intimate' would be the best word, as I can't actually see him or really talk to him?How do other people in a similar situation just cope and get on with it?
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male
reader, Racna1305  +, writes (21 November 2010):
 If its worth it then wait. But if this is gonna be a constant thing then it isn't fair to you and you CAN be happier. But who am I to tell you how happy you will be? If he is what makes you happy then go for it.
A
female
reader, xtwinklex +, writes (21 November 2010):
xtwinklex is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJust thought I should add that he's not back inside because he keeps offending and will therefore be back inside on many occasion.
His original time was for something he didn't do. There was no evidence and word against word went the wrong way.
He's only been recalled because they think he's been staying at mine. He hasn't but then who believes a criminal, right?
But, you are still right.5 months is a long time. How different will things be?
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A
male
reader, Racna1305 +, writes (21 November 2010):
Well, its ok wait for him and thats very sweet of you but then you gotta ask yourself.
Will he change? Is this what you really want?
Waiting for someone in the military is one thing but waiting for someone in jail? Is this the lifestyle he will keep living? If so this means you will constantly miss him, want him. Putting your life on hold for what? What if you have kids? Will your kids wait for him too? Talk to him and see if things will change. You dont need a guy who is in and out of jail, you are only putting your own life on hold and hurting yourself.
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