A
male
age
51-59,
*ake99
writes:Ok...So I met this wonderful lady with 3 kids 4 years ago and started dating. I got scared because I really liked her and then all of a sudden she disappeared. 4 years later, we meet up again and I find out that she has watched me from a far throughout the years. We both were out of recent relationships but we wanted to be with each other. 6 months into the relationship she was helping a friend out in another city over a weekend and sent me a note saying how much she loved me. The next day she returned and POW! she's gone again! I don't get it and trying to get answers. She emailed me to drop off a few things and won't respond to my emails. She blamed me for little things that seem to be an excuse and really trivial things.Any advise would be great...I love this girl and I would love to reconcile things if possible. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Brooklyngirl  +, writes (20 November 2010):
 This woman obviously doesn't know how to carry on a relationship....you don't bolt because of "little things." You stick around, communicate, and work things out!
If she is not willing to do this, then maybe there is something else going on that she is not telling you.
If she won't give you the opportunity to discuss the situation with her...then, there is not much you can do about it.
I would have to say move on and find someone who is willing to work on a healthy relationship....it doesn't just happen...it takes effort on both sides! I wish you luck!
A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (20 November 2010):
 How much time did you actually spend with her those 6 months? You don't seem to understand what kind of life she is living. When you say gone does that mean out of the city? If she had to go to another city for the weekend that means her ex or some family member was taking care of her kids? Maybe she's gone because it's her turn to take care of kids? You can't expect answers from strangers hoping to hear some general answer from this strange behavior, because in general women don't usually disappear like that. She stretches her life thin by trying to do so much. What that could mean is that she has little time for children and the significant other. I don't think this has to do with her playing games. The only word I can think of is serendipity, and that's how she likes her love to be.
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