A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey everyone, this is an issue thats been bothering me a lot recently. basically, i'm gay and have been in my first proper gay relationship for about 6 months now. our relationship is long distance and sometimes its hard not seeing eachother for a few weeks, but mostly its awesome and our sex life is great. this is my gf's first gay relationship too, and she has come out to both her friends and family. i, on the other hand, have only managed to tell a couple of close friends. basically, it's got to the point in the relationship where she wants me to meet her friends. for some reason i am not wholly comfortable with doing that, especially since one of her best friends is somebody she used to be in love with. at first i could put it off but now she's putting a little more pressure on me to meet them. i find the thought absolutely terrifying, firstly because i suck at meeting new people and secondly because i don't know how they'll take me. being my first gay relationship everything is a bit new and foreign to me still. my rationale to her is that we dont see eachother often and that id rather just see her. but then she retorts with something like "well we dont have to see them for long" but i can just imagine how awkward it will be while im standing there and shes chatting to her friends! so am i being out of order? Do I need to just bite the bullet and do this to make her happy? if so, how to feel better about it?! thanks.
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best friend, long distance, sex life Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Bobito +, writes (8 September 2010):
 Hello, honey.
Don't you think you're just making up an excuse when you say 'one of her best friends is somebody she used to be in love with'?
What is it that you're so insecure about? Is it that you're afraid your gf's mates won't like you? Or is it that you feel uncomfortable about being 'officially gay'?
If you're afraid her friends won't like you, then cheer up. If she wants you to meet them it means that she likes you a lot and that she won't change her mind about you, no matter what they think.
If you feel unconfortable about people knowing you're in a gay relationship, then... wake up! You ARE gay, whether people know it or not. Maybe you could tell more of your friends, first, so that they don't find out from other people.
Also, think of what you'd feel like if your gf was ashamed of introducing you to her friends. Not a nice thought, is it?
Just go for it. You love her and she loves you. Is there anything better?
xxx
A
female
reader, Fefi  +, writes (7 September 2010):
 oh you never know, it can be really fun. you are all girls so i cant imagine why they would blank you. im sure you can hit it off with them like they've been friends since forever...
as for the other girl ur gf used to like, who cares?? your presence there will only prove that now she is YOUR girlfriend.
good luck, tell me how it goes and make your girlfriend happy ;)
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A
female
reader, AuntyAlexxmo +, writes (7 September 2010):
 This girl likes you. You make her happy. Her happiness is what will be important to her friends, so knowing that you make her happy means that they will already have a liking for you and will make it easier for you to make a good impression. The longer you put it off the harder it will be , when really it is a simple thing that you should not worry about just be yourself and they will like you for that. good luck =]
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