A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I was in a relationship for 5 years right out of high school. During the realtionship he lied and cheated multiple times and I stayed because I was young and stupid. I mean I took him back after everytime he cheated.... so dumb I even had 2 abortions because I knew that he wouldnt help me take care of out baby. As my 23rd birthday was approaching I have been maturing within myself and noticed that the treatment that I had been receiving wasnt what I wanted anymore so I ended it. I still speak to him on a daily basis and he questions why I am so distant and my reason being that he's hurt me in the past and he needs to make some changes within hisself before I can even think about dealing with him again. I know that hes not gonna change. Hes too selfish.I have been talking to an old friend for about a month and a half now and he treats me well, the things I dont like I let him know and its early enough to where he can change it. He does the same with me. He's at the point where he wants to date exclusively with me but he wants me to let my ex know.My question is, do i just let my ex know that I have moved on or do I just keep telling him that Im not talking to anyone.
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female
reader, cupidus +, writes (16 May 2011):
"I have been talking to an old friend for about a month and a half now and he treats me well, the things I dont like I let him know and its early enough to where he can change it. He does the same with me. He's at the point where he wants to date exclusively with me but he wants me to let my ex know."
You would be wise to allow this new RS into your life and drop the old one. You do still seem attracted to the old one, why is that? There is still something this guy does for you that you like, is that good enough to keep him around and risk your new RS?
A
female
reader, auntyR +, writes (16 May 2011):
you don't need to tell him anything. You are finished with him, so therefore your private life has nothing to do with him. Enjoy your new relationship and forget about him.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2011): I think you should simply stop talking to your ex so you can move on. He's a guy who treated you like garbage so he's not your friend anyway. There's no need for any kind of explanation, he knows what a jerk he was.
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A
female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (16 May 2011):
You owe your ex nothing really. Why do you even still speak to your ex on a daily basis anyway? You know he treated you like crap, you know he won't change, so just tell him that you have now met someone nice and that you hope he finds someone nice too. Hopefully that should stop the daily contact (unless you don't want it to...)
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