A
female
age
51-59,
*annie6666
writes:My boy friend whom I have been living with for the past two years well I came home from work and I found out that he had moved all his clothes in to the spare room it has been like this for two weeks. He says he need time to sort out his thoughts and he is very tired. We are having a lot of stress with money etc and he has to go to court over his drivers licence. He locks his room when he is out. What do I do? Give him space?
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female
reader, Caring Aunty A +, writes (7 July 2014):
 What The Hey – I sense there’s something else going on here, as who locks, and to what purpose does it serve to lock his (spare) room from a girlfriend of 2 years? More information is needed Zannie...
I understand the man-cave, space, timeout etc. concept but this is bizarre if it’s just happened out of the blue. Money issues and pending Court matters have nothing to do with locking a door; it suggests he’s hiding something or does not trust...? If he is tied then he needs a Cave to escape momentarily sure enough. Yet he locks the door when he is out – curious indeed!
I’d be suspicious, curious and want to get to the bottom of it all with giving him patience... 2-3 weeks is long enough to gently start approaching the goings on inside his head.
CAA
A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (6 July 2014):
Money can cause a lot of problems and also the fact that he is going to court would be stressful. However the answer is not by locking you out of his room.It would be important to have an indept chat with him about the money issue and maybe ideas of sorting it out .The court situation needs to be talked about as well.This is not very easy for you at the moment and if the above does not work.Would you suggest that you would both go and see a counsellor this would be of great help .It will take time to sort this out and a lot of understand on both sides Kind Wishes NORA B.
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