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Do I leave my new job after only one week, and how should I go about it?

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Question - (4 July 2016) 9 Answers - (Newest, 11 July 2016)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hey guys :-) so I hope no one minds but I have a career question here, I've been stressed about it all week and as the DC community are so lovely I thought I would ask here.

Anyway I'm 23 and have been working in a public sector office job for just over a year now. It's not great pay, but I love the people and it's stress free (something I really wanted in a job, after a previous job being so stressful).

Recently I got offered to go on a 6 month secondment (with view of permanency) for the same company, but a different job role entirely and in a different building. Also it's a higher position but the same money. It was something I had previously applied for but had been unsuccessful. Anyway I went for the interview and was successful - I was told the next day that I started on Monday - so the whole thing happened in just over a week, I didn't have much time to think about it.

Anyway I said bye to my friends and even had a leaving party. It was my first day at the job last Monday and I hated it. The training is terrible and I find it dull - there is no atmosphere, the team is very small (only 3 people) and I don't enjoy the work - plus the commute is much longer. It's actually a good job, but it's just really not for me.

I feel terrible because the people are so nice, as is my new manager. Today she asked me if I had any issues or concerns, and I stupidly said no (I'm quite shy and wasn't prepared). Because I'm on a secondment, I still have a permanent contract at my old job and can probably go back if I want. The other thing is, I have done this before. I got offered an opportunity from the same company and pulled out before I started the job - I'm worried they will see a pattern. My boyfriend has had to comfort me crying all week and I feel so guilty, but I'm just not happy.

My question is, should I ask to go back to my old job? And if so, should I speak to my manager at my old job first - to ask for permission - before I tell my current manager how I feel?

Thank you so much for reading this and to anyone that responds, and I'm sorry for writing so much :-)

View related questions: money, shy

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2016):

Hey guys :) I'm the OP and just wanted to say a huge thank you for all the responses, it was really great to get some unbiased advice so thanks for taking the time!

Well I'm still battling through my job, trying to stay as long as I can whilst looking for something else. I knew from the first day it wasn't for me and feel the same. I am 'in charge of my own training' and feel almost left to my own devices, even though the work is very hard. I also found out that I was only offered the job because the original person who got it dropped out. There is no structure to my training. I will try to stay as long as I can though as I know it looks better in the long run, at least until my secondment ends.

Thanks guys for your help :)

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2016):

I wouldn't suggest quitting, at least until you have another job to go to.

I know how it feels to be in a job that is just a complete mismatch from day 1. That was my last job. I knew as soon as lunch on the first day I would never be able to do the job for a living. I had no medical background and a job as a Pathology Collector is hard enough as it is, let alone when everyone else is from nursing or some other medically trained background and actually likes dealing with the general public.

But I stuck it out for two months before I left because I needed to give it the best shot I could, regardless of how constantly atressed it made me every day, even when I wasn't there or how it destroyed my ability to enjoy weekends because I knew I would have to go back. That's why I left. I wasn't getting better at the job and I knew that if I was still having as hard a time at the two month mark as I was on the first day, the job was not for me.

I wasn't able to line a job up before I left and that has made things harder than they need be.

So try everything, as I did, to make it work, talk to people and your bosses to see what can be done and line up another position if you make the decision to leave and give them proper notice.

Remember, no one will ever remember how you started, but they sure as hell will remember how you leave.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (5 July 2016):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntI'd love to say get your old job back, but you'll either get fired or have 2 marks against you.

I feel for you, but you only have two options: stick it out of quit altogether and lose the old job too. If you quit, though, your reference won't be very good.

You learn what works for you by trying them, but maybe "failing" the first time indicated you weren't right for the job. Now you have it and it's not the right job for you either.

It's dull, but it's a job. The training sucks, so ask for more. Try to make this work. Stick it out.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (5 July 2016):

CindyCares agony aunt No no - otherwise they will have to see a pattern, because there would be one.

You got offered an opportunity , you accepted... and then you pulled back before starting the job.

Then you applied for your current position, you failed, they were nice enough to change their mind and give you another chance, .. and you'd turn it down after one week ?

... and they'd let you even stay after that ?! - leave alone giving your further career opportunities / taking you on board permanently.

My, they are nice people. Or they must really like you and see a lot of potential in you.

Because- not meaning to be a b...h. but honestly I feel that your way to handle choices and responsibilities would raise quite a few eyebrows in any management of anything .

Don't push your luck, and enjoy the opportunities you are given ( .. and whch you DID apply for ... ) , and the consideration being shown to you.

You've got 6 months to get adjusted, as I am sure you will end up doing . Then if in 6 months you still haven't adjusted , you can decide that this job, or any similar one, was not for you. Not now.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (5 July 2016):

Honeypie agony auntOP, it's 6 months. You can do it. Dry your eyes and act like a grown woman. You APPLIED for this job, you TOOK it and now only a week later you are whining because it's not your old job. Come on... 6 months will fly by.

If you hadn't already done something similar before I would have suggested you talk to your new and old boss, but... you quit now? You will have 2 strikes against you when it comes time to promotions. So SUCK it up and keep contact with your "old" co-workers and you might be back with then sooner than you think (6 months can really fly by).

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A female reader, Ivyblue Australia +, writes (4 July 2016):

Ivyblue agony auntSame company and not the first time you have done it, do it again and it's professional suicide IMHO. I week is not really enough time to see how things pan out. Personally I think it would be wise to stick it out. You dont really know how it will all turn out as you go along and get more into what the training has to offer. If its the same company there is no reason why you cant still keep relations going from other departments. Opportunity doesn't knock that often.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2016):

Stick at it at least until the secondment ends - you can do it!!!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2016):

My dear, only a week? I think you're just missing your old job and colleagues. You're in a new environment, and things are different. No,no, and no! It would be most unwise and unprofessional to quit after only a week. There was a lot of consideration to place you there; and other candidates were turned down for the opportunity.

The next time you apply for a higher position, you will be placed at the bottom of the pile. They won't think you can cut it. If you're crying, they may be right. Don't be afraid. Grab the bull by the horns, girlfriend! Get a grip!

You were chosen because you've got what it takes. Stop making excuses. The pay is the same, it's dull, blah blah blah! It's more experience and you're showing versatility and flexibility. That's an asset to any company. Trust me on this, I know!

Stay where you are, and stop the crying. Man-up and deal with it. It will payoff in the long-run. If you miss the others, stay in-touch.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (4 July 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntOkay I will be honest with you, if it is the same company and you refused a job once, then done an interview for this and then refused this one, then yes they will see a pattern, not only that but they will not take you serious, they will feel like you are messing around and not being professional. If you where happy at your last job and content then you should have stayed at it. Nothing from the new job sounds horrible and if I am being honest I think you should just suck it up and give it a chance. Crying over it is not going to help, you should just be thankful that you have a job.

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