A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I had a bad break up with my ex 5 years back we were dating 6 years. She had my baby and gave me a choice my new girlfriend or her and the baby. I chose my girlfriend. 5 years have past and now my ex is sending me pics of my child telling me all about her. I don't know what I should do like What does my ex want from me Why now Should I tell my gfShould I ignore herDoes she want to get back with me I am lonely as my gf is gone overseas for 6months for work.
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female
reader, deirdre +, writes (26 August 2015):
I agree with the others. Stop being so selfish and grow up. If you want to cheat on your current girlfriend then stop wasting her time and break up with her, that way she can let herself be open to meeting someone faithful.
A
female
reader, b_waldorf  +, writes (26 August 2015):
I highly doubt that your ex girlfriend is aware that your current girlfriend wlll be working away, or that she is intending on getting back with you.She has more than likely moved on romantically and has sent you pictures of your child and tried to get you to see your child as your child is now 5 years old and is probably asking 'where's my daddy?' after seeing other children at school with two parents. I dont know what i find worse, that you think that your gf going away is an excuse to cheat, that youve made no effort in having a relationship with your child or that you think your ex telling you about your child is actually her saying that she wants you back.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (26 August 2015):
 Wow...just WOW! You don't give a toss that you haven't seen your child in 5 years but just because your current girlfriend is away, you're considering going back to the ex, NOT for the baby but because you're not getting sex!
You obviously have no moral compass because you're basically asking strangers on the internet if its OK to cheat. I don't know who's the more lucky woman-the ex who's so desperate that she still wants you back or the current one who you want to cheat on. You clearly are a catch!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2015): Hold on,hold on!
You haven't seen your child in 5 years?! 5 years!?
And you care more about "gf" vs "ex" than about your child?
My guess is- the child has started asking about you (you know,5 year olds, the little, curious human beings that can speak, talk etc.?)
Your ex might not be trying to do anything with you. Just to get you to be a daddy again.
Meanwhile, you keep thinking:"Hmmm,should I get in her panties whilst my gf is away coz I'm so "lonely"...?"
My guess- if you are seriously considering that (yes, even considering it is bad), you don't really love the gf.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (26 August 2015):
 Surely you have a responsibility to your child? Your progeny deserves to know his father. Are you offering any financial support?
And yes of course you should tell your girlfriend? Come on! Man up. If it is your baby then it is half your duty to see it is raised properly.
No, you don't go running back just because your girlfriend is away. Stop acting like a teenager.
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A
female
reader, chipmunk37 +, writes (26 August 2015):
 From the information you have given I would think that your ex contacting you now is not about her but about your child. If she is five she is just starting school and no doubt is seeing all the other children with their parents and is curious about her own "Daddy". Maybe to the point of asking your ex about you.
Your ex is telling you all about your daughter is no doubt leading up to asking you to met her so she can get to know you. It is up to you if you want to get to know your daughter and be involved in her life but do not just use her mother for entertainment while your girlfriend is away. If you left her and her baby for another woman I seriously doubt she would be interested in an fling with you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2015): You *let* her just take your child? Why didn't you fight for the child? Why not go to court to pay child support and get visitation? You should *never* choose *anyone* over your baby. You didn't have to break up with your current girlfriend back then, you just needed to get court-ordered parental rights. That's what you need to do now.Stop thinking about how lonely you are and think about how that child's father couldn't be bothered to fight for her.Tell your girlfriend that you're going to do the right thing, that you should have done in the beginning, and you're going to get visitation with your daughter and pay child support. That should cure the loneliness because you'll be busy.If you refuse to do the above, why? It doesn't mean you need to have anything to do with your ex, other than seeing your daughter. Besides, it's like you're willing to have sex with your ex, but not see your child. I mean, your ex messaged you about your child and your only thoughts is about the ex and you together!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2015): yes the man likes to think of himself and in this case he is considering a six month rekindlement with wifey, years after he split from her and the baby ,simply because the girlfriend has got a job to do abroad....so what is a man to do..ouch..you need a serious bit of soul searching about loving, or professing you love the most available woman on the timeline.Perhaps your baby mother has moved on quite a long way emotionally and sends you photos of your child so that you can be a man and acknowledge the child in some fatherly manner...or maybe you are thinking you could bed the mother and fit a dna test in especially if you have been refusing to pay maintenance money because that would be the next step of the drama so far,but hell man i dont know,i just know for sure that i am not your demoted wifeys baby mama,and only you know all the details why you downranked her to ex.Perhaps i should be ripping holes in you because you shoukd have been regularly paying maintenance and visiting your blood,but hey man, you sound as though you prioritize sex way above personal relationships of the committed sort, so as it stands ,unless there is significant emotional growth on your part, you may find that your ex expects more than a quick in betweeny whilst your girlfriend is abroad.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2015): Think about your current girlfriend. She is relying on you to be faithful. I don't know much about her, but isn't it better to be loyal?
Don't get back with your ex, it ended for a reason. Yes your girlfriend is leaving but she will be back.
Just hold off on the temptation and get it out by watching porn. Don't cheat.
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