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Do I delete her on facebook?

Tagged as: Friends, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 November 2021) 7 Answers - (Newest, 27 November 2021)
A male United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Hi aunts

need your help with this one as it’s a strange situation to find myself in. so recently I bumped into a female from school who I’d known and she used to have this crush on me or so she says. we never got together at school, as I didn’t want to pursue anything back then. as I wasn’t ready for that kind of relationship. she asked me if I had facebook and I told her I had. after a week had gone by, she sent me a friend request and I dually accepted. this is the bit where I’m confused and I’ll explain.

sent a message to her, just the one and she never replied, is she trying to teach me a lesson or is it just paranoia? I find it strange and feel I’ve been made a fool out of.

should I delete her as a friend on facebook? what should I say to her if I end up seeing her again in town?

help needed

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A male reader, Kofcalifornia United States +, writes (27 November 2021):

She could have been locked ut of her account. Also u should not have given her your facebook if u suspect she is a shady person like that. Dont ever assume the worst from people. Innocent until proven guilty. Maybe she saw your posts/photos and simply lost interest. Blocking her will make u look butthurt and petty. Just move forward with your life and dont ruminate over this anymore.

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom +, writes (24 November 2021):

kenny agony auntIs facebook the only means of communication that you have with her?. You have not got a phone number, whats app, email, etc.

I think that you are over thinking it a little as to why she has not responded to a face book message. Maybe the other aunts are right, she just wanted to snoop.

I would be inclined to just leave it, if you happen to bump into each other just be pleasant and polite and maybe ask did you ever receive the message i sent you on FB.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2021):

I should have said:

"Some people only send friend-requests to farm [and harvest] your friends and contacts; and spy on other people whom you both may know."

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2021):

She had a crush back in high school, that doesn't mean she still has one now. She asked under what only seems to be a pretense to keep in-touch, as old schoolmates often do; maybe just for social reasons, not necessarily romantic. I'd consider her suspect now that she's being weird.

No response doesn't usually mean much; maybe that she just doesn't check her FB page that often, or just hasn't gotten around to a response. Some people just like to collect contacts only for the purpose of nosing into your life, as Honeypie suggested. Some people only send friend-requests to farm your friends and contacts; and spy on other people whom you both may know.

I'd block her from any further access. I wouldn't worry if you see her again. She didn't respond when you messaged her, that sends me the message you're probably not interested in contact. I wouldn't unblock her, even if she asked me to. No drama.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom +, writes (21 November 2021):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntI think you are overthinking this. So you sent her a message and she didn't reply? People have lives. Have you never read a message from someone, thought "I'll reply to that later, when I have time" and then forgotten about it? I know for a fact that I have done this on numerous occasions.

If you delete her now, it will look like you have spat out your dummy because she hasn't replied to you. In your shoes I would just leave her on your Facebook account but don't send any more messages. If you bump into her, you could always say "Heh, I sent you a message. Did you get it?" Just keep it light-hearted because it is not something which is worth getting all serious about.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2021):

I agree with honeypie Maybe she just wants to snoop around. since u`ve chatted her leave it,if she decides to talk,fine!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (20 November 2021):

Honeypie agony auntDo you WANT to talk to her? Do you WANT her in your life or are you a bit indifferent?

If you aren't really keen to "get to know" her again, I'd just remove her. Because what is the point? Maybe she wanted access to snoop around?

Or just leave her be? Let her hang out on your Facebook while you go about your life. You already sent her a message and she hasn't replied.

My guess is she is probably not as keen as she was back then. Or she is playing games.

Either way, it's UP to you what you want to do.

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