A
female
age
41-50,
*ashay
writes:Me and this guy have been dating for about 5 months and in this 5 months we have only spent about 2 weeks apart! He is different from anyother guy I have ever dated. Well his wife in which they have been split for 2 years has started causing us problems they have 2 children together. First she told him she wanted him to come home so he left and stayed at his mom's for a week then he realized that he wanted to come back home and so I let him and now 1 month later she has started it all over again and so I was at work on Monday and everything was fine at 4:00 and at 4:19 he called and told me he was done to move on that he had things he had to take care of and he was moving out! Since then he has been a complete ass, but I feel like he is just taking the easy way out by pushing me away, he want even face me! He works for my best friend and so yesterday I went by there and took some papers to him that he needed for court on Friday and he wouldn't even look at me!! I know he loves me and I know he is confused, but do I continue to tell him how much I love him or do I just let him go and figure this out by himself? By the way his wife cheated on him 3 times.
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female
reader, mashay +, writes (7 November 2008):
mashay is verified as being by the original poster of the questionjust wanted to let everyone know that it was confirmed last friday halloween that he had went back to his wife. i was devastated even though i knew that was what he was gonna have to do to prove either way if thats where he wanted to be !!i did just as everyone said i didn't text or call at all then on sunday he texted me wanting to know what i was doing , i was so mad i didnt even bother to text back then on monday he started texting first thing in the morning at 7 am telling me he was stupid that he was sorry talking about he just needed to kill himself and all kinds of crazy talk ! so then tuesday he called and i told him i was there as his friend if he just needed someone to lean on that it didnt have to be about us that i could be just his friend !! well anyways on wedensday he got off work and went back to her house and told his babies he would see em this weekend ! he told her he was sorry there was just too much time that had gone by and that he was coming back to chattanooga and so he is here now, but i have my heart on guard cause i dont want him to break it again
A
female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (30 October 2008):
 I know it's hard for you and I can totally sympathise with you but you've told him now. Now you need to be strong and keep your distance from him until he makes up his mind. Keep yourself busy, although it's hard, try not to think about the situation. Build yourself up, pamper yourself and have your hair and nails done, buy some new clothes, anything to make YOU feel good about yourself. Play some "feel good" music like Queen's "Don't Stop Me Now" or "I Feel Good" by James Brown.
~Eve~
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A
female
reader, mashay +, writes (30 October 2008):
mashay is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks so much my heart is breaking and when he left for the week last time she did this all i did was call him and go by and tell him that i was truly in love with him !! this is so hard and i just want him to realize she is just playing with his emotions and i truly love him it took him leaving the first time for me to realize i was really in love with him !! i had not told him that i was in love with him until that point and when he left i felt like i had not told him everything he needed to know
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (30 October 2008):
I agree with Smiles, you need to leave him to it and let him sort his life out. He's maybe struggling right now with lots of things,his loyalty to his kids, loyalty to you and his feelings for his ex. Should he go there again or should he not? Does he really love you or is it just infatuation? What does he REALLY want from life?
DON'T pressure him with phone calls and text messages or make contact with him an any way. Remember, absence makes the heart grow fonder. "If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were..."
~Eve~
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2008): Dear Poster
No matter how difficult this might be for you; I suggest you give him time and space. Go on with your life; don't put your life on hold for him. Let him sort out his own problems and issues. Keep your distance; don't let him think you are desperate for him. He knows where to find you if and when; BUT I suggest you only give him another chance once he is divorced. Don't let him run between you and his wife. Take a firm stand on that, otherwise he will use you when things are uncomfortable at home, he will run to you. NO, you have to be strong and avoid that from happening.
Let him be, don't wait around for him forever.
Be strong and think about your happiness and your future. You don't want a man in your life that "jumps" when his ex slaps her fingers do you?
I send you lots of hugs and smiles.
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