A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:do guys like clingy girls... i am reposting this question because i didnt get many respondes i need different opinions... me and my boyfriend have been together for a while now and everything is good except that we dont communicate that much... he says that hes not a phone person.. should i believe that? i am away at school and i havent been home in 2 months so i always want to talk to him like everyday even if its just a text.... he has gotten where he doesnt really text me that much its always me doing it .. i dont really call him cause he works nights and i know that he sleeps during the day ... so its kind of akward to really talk to him on the phone unless he calls me himself... so i guess my question is am i being to clingy or should i just relax a little bit b/c i might be overreacting?... i just feel like im being to clingy wanting to talk to him everyday... should i just let him make the moves like should i let him call me and text me?...i love him so much he is such a good guy and i dont want to lose him so what should i do ... please help i am a little confused....
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe is also 21. He works at a very good job and he makes a lot of money... it’s just that he works nights and sleeps during the day so it is hard to communicate during the day.He did call me the other day and told me he misses me a lot. He has just been really tired he works 6 days a week. He doesn’t do anything, he doesn’t hang out with friends on the weekends, he just sits at home thinking about me. He has gotten into the habit of drinking on the weekends. I don’t like that because I think that he is just doing it out of loneliness from missing me. He could be depressed because I’m not there, he just doesn’t want to admit it or he just doesn’t know how to talk about it. It seems that everything is okay ...I think I was just overreacting a little bit. He did say that he will call and text more so that’s good. Thanks for the advice it really helped a lot.
A
female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (26 February 2011):
 Honey, I am sorry to tell you this but your relationship with this boy is probably not going to survive long distance.Please don't freak out and do anything crazy like let your grades suffer of drop out of school. That won't help win him back and you will be the one who suffers for it for the rest of your life.Just tell him nicely that you think the two of you need to take a break from each other for awhile and see how he reacts. It's possible he is already seeing someone else and just didn't know how to tell you. Or maybe he is afraid that you will meet someone else or are that you are growing away from him as you become more educated then him. You don't say where he is or what he is doing, but if you are in college and he is working at a dead end job right out of high school then he may be right about that. You're going places and he isn't. Most guys don't do well with that. It's not anyones fault and is just a sign of his immaturity. But you can't stop growing as person for a guy or you will regret it for the rest of your life. And/or resent him for holding you back. But if he responds to your request for a break by working harder to call you and text you and tells you he doesn't want to lose you then you still might have a chance to save the relationship. Use the opportunity to set some ground rules about how often you expect to hear from him. Without your having to call or text him first all the time.Anything less then that should be taken a sign that you need to end the relationship for good and move on with your life.Good Luck!
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A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (26 February 2011):
 The answer to your question applies to the majority of guys and it is a flat out no. I would rather have a strong independent girl then one who needs me for everything that she does.
He may very well not like being on the phone. People are completely different on the phone and he may feel like he is awkward so he becomes uncomfortable.
Now you two do need to communicate for this to work and just wanting to talk to him is not being clingy. Maybe you could try a webcam so that you two could see each other which may help. Everyday may be a bit much because then it becomes routine but every second or third day is more reasonable so you two actually have something to share instead of just giving each other status updates throughout the day.
When you get a chance talk to him about this and let him know that you would like to talk more but again every day is a bit too much. If he cares about you he will understand and try to help.
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