A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years we are happy we live together and never argue there's just one problem his interest in other women I know all men look but he stares for ages I have told him many times how this upsets me but he just says its because he was single for that long is this just a natural thing men do thank you Reply to this Question
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female
reader, PeanutButter  +, writes (18 October 2015):
 Yes, it is natural, and women do it to, to men. However, the fact that you've expressed to him that it makes you uncomfortable and he's doing it still, and for long periods of time, is hurtful to you and he should have a gentle nudge and an "oi" next time, to remind him. See if you can check out some guys in his presense and see how he likes it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2015): I'm a gay man and I like to check out pretty women. I like their curves, and pretty faces, pretty legs, and how they move. I'm still gay, but not just pretty women catch my eye.
There's just something about women that pulls your eye to them. I think it's inherently wired in men continuously through primitive evolution. All the gay men I know, still checkout women. They don't want to sleep with them, but they awe at their hotness and femininity.
You're powerful creatures, and if your husband or boyfriend looks, it's a natural reflex. If their hearts and bodies go where their eyes go, then they've gone too far.
Your husband or boyfriend should be respectful of how long he "looks." Long stares when you are with someone is disrespectful, knuckle-headed, and brands you as a potential cheater. So a glimpse is respectful, a stare is not. Slap the back of his head to snap him out of it ladies!
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (17 October 2015):
 It's natural to look at otherbeautiful people (men OR women). As long as it doesn't make someone uncompfortable.If you don't want him to look then tell him so.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 October 2015):
 Well said ,You Wish. Even if something it's natural, it does not mean that you can't control it according to the circumstances.
Wanting to blow your nose is natural, you can't have a problem with someone who needs to blow his nose. The problem starts if they grab the first thing at hand- the tablecloth, or my sleeve ! - and blow into it.
There's a right time and a right way to do things - any thing.
So, all men look - but only yokels STARE.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (17 October 2015):
 I don't mean to sound crude, but in my opinion, this is the best analogy:
You ask "Do all men stare at other women? Is it natural?"
I'll respond with another question.
"Do all men scratch their testicles and adjust themselves? Is it natural?"
The answer to all four questions is a resounding YES!!!
However the question to ask now is:
"Do all men scratch/adjust/ogle other women in public?"
The answer to that is a resounding NO!
A guy who has no manners, stares at women, rubbernecking and leering so that it's obvious has just about as much breeding as a guy who sits in a park bench with women and children playing and proceeds to spread legs wide apart and scratch away. It's disgusting.
Men with GOOD manners learn to go in private to scratch, or better yet, take better showers and practice better hygiene to begin with. Likewise, men with GOOD manners, use peripheral vision and don't rubberneck when a good-looking woman passes by, whether they're in front of their wives/girlfriends or whether they're alone in a gym where it's not appropriate to stare during workouts or while she's working out.
Your guy has bad manners if he's staring constantly in front of you. I get guys looking because that's natural, but it's also natural to pick one's nose, but does that mean that someone should go "digging for gold" at a job interview and then say "Hey, it's a guy thing!" when confronted? Nope.
Your guy doesn't respect you if he's not making it discreet in front of you. Even single guys who stare too long are considered "creepy". Women are not to be objectified. Your guy may want to go back to being single, and you should make that happen. What a gross guy. I bet he doesn't wash his hands when he leaves a bathroom either.
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A
male
reader, KnightnDay  +, writes (17 October 2015):
Yes all men look ! Im 52 and simple answer is yes but the how is more important and can lead to the why. I will say that when men are in love, They wont notice anyone but their lady. No one else matters at that point. Once comfort sets in with a relationship then they will notice attractive women and even the girls you may think are plain can have a certain sex appeal . Staring is disresctful to the girlfriend more than the woman of his visual attention but that has to be unnerving for any woman to be oogled especially when the mans girlfriend is standing by ; Either condoning his actions or being totally disrespectful. Either way the woman of the attention must question this guys integrity and your self confidence by hanging with a guy that disrespects you. It immature no excuses. Everyone notices the opposite sex. Sometimes the same sex notices attractive or bizzarre people . No biggie . The waitress always looks good and humans are wired to notice. Men are very visual. No staring .. ! Is he looking for her number too?Respect yourself be bold be confident and tell him to hit thr road. If he needs time to grow up then he can do it without you. If has excuses he can tell it to his buddies when they all giggle and oogle together. Other women can be disrespected but not you. Life is short it really is. Find someone to love you not just someone to hang out with. Raise the bar and you will have it . Look in the right places and weed them out. There are jerks and abusers but there are also nice ghys that no how to respect a woman. It may take a while and not maki g excuses but it does take us guys longer to grow up at times. My son actually stuns me with his maturity and respect for others at age 18. No one is perfect all guys will look. But staring! Dont let it slide and dont ever accept being disrespected or it will happen as long as this relationship lasts and the next one as well if you arent making sure you are important to him . Respect .. love .. together.. it has to start early before love .. set the bar high you are worth it. But be a good bar for your dream guy to want in his life too. Good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2015): There are men who "look" at women too much and men who don't. If he's making it this obvious and it upsets you after this amount of time then I doubt he will change. It's a personality flaw for me. I have dated both. The ones who look too much tend to be more sexually visual. Some women are ok with it and it doesn't bother them. Some aren't. I can't tolerate it and when I look back on these relationships found it a major turn off and couldn't get past it. It causes a lot of anguish on both sides.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2015): There are men who "look" at women and men who don't. If hes making it this obvious and it upsets you after this amount of time then I doubt he will change. Its a personslity flaw. I have dated both. The ones who look too much tend to be more sexually visual. Some wimen
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (17 October 2015):
Looking is normal, staring is rude and disrespectful to both you and the other girl.
Mature men know how to respectfully and discreetly glance without being a creep about it.
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