A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I live in Texas and met a guy who lives in North Dakota. We talked, emailes and texted everyday for about 2 months. He is in the military and was getting a long weekend off so wanted me fly there. I bought a ticket and off I went very excited to see him. The trip I thought went great. We did become intimate but I felt we connected more than that. I flew home and did not hear from him. Didn't answer my calls, texts, emails. I didn't know what was going on. Then I got really mad because after the weekend we just had I felt I was being disrespected and if something changed for him he should just tell me but don't leave me not knowing. So I sent him an angry email. That go his attention. He emailed me back and said after I left he got sick with the flu and didnt feel like talking to anyone and would email more later that night. Email? I thought why not call? So another email saying and accusing him of things that I now regret. If he was going to call and he did care I blew it. How can I get him to understand why I felt disrespected and upset. Three weeks and he still hasnt called. Did I over-react?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): Well to my amazement I received an "email" from him. He says I was over-reacting and he didn't mean to hurt me, that he does care and I am exactly what he needs in his life right now BUT is not ready for marriage! What the #%&@
Marriage?! I never said anything about marriage! I didn't even say I love you to him. I did tell him I had feelings but love and marriage? I have no clue where he got that idea. My question now is why is he saying this stuff to me, that he cares and I am what he needs, etc. but he still
cannot pick up the phone and call me? I do really like him and wanted to continue a relationship but he has me so freakin confused. I hate that he will not talk to me directly. What is he hiding? And if he doesn't want anything with me why send me that email? I replied to his email asking him to just call me but so far the phone has not rang. What is he really feeling? Or thinking???
A
female
reader, always.you +, writes (4 June 2009):
holy shit dude i live in texas and i was seing this guy from south dakota haha how ironic is that. and he pretty much pulled the same shit on me but i didnt go see him. send me a message and we can talk some more.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): Hi,you are fine just doing your part,honestly you are his gf right, so he would have call/mail you that his sick but how came i he kept quite,if he thinks of you and cares he would have told you at the first prce that honey, i'm sick since the day you left it might being better.you are not disrepecting you have a right to be upset if thing are wrong somewhere tell him to be true and honest with you coz thus wouldn't be the resone for keeping silence or something happen between you two when you where with him?maybe thus why he kept quite.by the way he need to apologes to you not you to him coz say the trueth.
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A
female
reader, sarcy24 +, writes (4 June 2009):
I don't think you overreacted at all. Ok if he was ill he probably didn't feel like talking and you went a bit over the top moaning about e-mailing and not calling but I do think that you flying over there, you making love to him and with you both having a nice time that you would expect a response. However, I would not worry about the 3 weeks time going by as miliary men often have no access to the internet and are often very busy. If you like him I would send a text just casually asking him how he is - do not ask for any answers or even refer to being disrespected and upset - men in the main hate confrontation and having to justify themselves so I would let it go. Next time I would make him come to you and make the effort that way.
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A
female
reader, deadpromqueen +, writes (4 June 2009):
you overreacted, just email him or write a letter, and tell him how not talking to you made you feel, and if he doesn't respond then he's not worth it anymore.
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