A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and i have been together 6 months and are in love. She travels for her job and i've sacrificed a lot because of this. Currently she is across the country for 3 months. She recently went on a weekend trip w friends. It was a few girls and 2 guys one of her friends knew. They all get drunk (guys buying the drinks of course), end up at the guys house After the bar closes as a group. So the girl who knew then leaves w the others and its my gf and her one friend with the guys.She said she wanted to leave but the girl liked the guy so she stayed. Anyways they go from talking to dancing and that's when the guy tried to kiss her twice and grabbed her butt.The next day when we talked she had mentioned how she saved the day because she left after they got 'touchy'. She never told me the whole story until 2 days later.I'm furious and told her i want to take a break and not see her on valentines day. I dont think a good girlfriend even gets in that situation of letting guys get her drunk and dancing w then at 4 am at their place. Months back i got into a fight w her because she told me when she's w her friends they have a contest to see who can get the most numbers (no hooking up just numbers). I didn't like that either.Anyways I'm just looking for advicr on this because i don't trust her right now especially w the fact that she's on the road 6 months a year.Also she says she pushed the guy away when he tried which i believe, but there's a hole in that since he was able to try twice
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male
reader, M Proops  +, writes (6 February 2014):
I was listening to a TV programme this morning about cheating.A relationship counsellor phoned in and said the biggest change he's seen in recent years has been a massive increase in female infidelity in relationships.Im afraid your girlfriend is putting herself in situations where something will happen and if she's done it once then it'll happen again.You'll only tear yourself apart thinking what she's up to when away.I don't think this relationship has a future.
A
male
reader, Gauntlet  +, writes (4 February 2014):
 The doubt must be on the suspect side (as I've already written on DC today). There is no proof anything serious actually happened, but if my gf did the same than yours, sure I would be as suspicious and tensed as you are. 100%But if nothing really happened, it would be unfair to punish her, you can blame her to have put herself in such a dangerous situation, but you can't punish her without any solid evidence.A lot of people say girls are more mature than boys, and earlier. I don't agree at all. They are earlier attracted by boys (who in the meantime prefer to play and to have fun with their male friends) and earlier learn to use their charms to attract them. That's just a love parade, but most of girls don't have a clue about what that lead them to and a lot of these girls end to have sex without actually knowing how did it happen, not why and sometime they even don't remember with who.I don't want to look misogynous - so don't get me wrong please - but you have to remember girls sometime are incredibly ingenues and naives, that's what happened to your girlfriend. Hope she will have the lesson well learnt.Don't waste your valentine by your rage, particularly if she has to be away for several months. Love is about forgiving too, but you know that I bet ?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2014): In your shoes, I also wouldn't trust this type of behaviour. Maybe she's not really meant to be in a committed relationship at this point in her life.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (4 February 2014):
Well I wasn't there so I can't tell you for sure, but it sounds like she definitely put herself in a situation where it could have happened. Avoiding these situations is critical if you're to remain faithful, especially when drinking.
The fact that she got herself in this situation is almost as bad as if she had cheated.
Unless she confesses you'll always have doubt. Especially because she's irresponsible either way. Maybe this isn't the best relationship for you.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (4 February 2014):
 No trust...no relationship. All the love in the world don't mean zippadee if there is no trust.
If she was a guy playing flirty games with other women, He'd be dumpable...it's no different for girls, playing silly flirty games doesn't mean she cheated but it's not the best way to show respect for a partner.
She's had two strikes already. is it worth continuing to see if there will be a third?
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