A
female
age
36-40,
*anillafrost
writes:My relationship of nine months ended 2 months ago because my ex boyfriend didnt have feelings for me anymore, wanted time and space for him alone, and we argued too much! He was tired of fighting. It was a hard break up for me cuz i loved him, we had great memories to preserve. I begged him not to give up, but it didnt work. We are also colleagues.. Now 2 months later, we stayed friends. He still treats me like princess and got me a scarf and chocolate for valentines day! He accidentally held my hand cuz he was used to it? Apart from that he rarely touched me? He says im special person to him but not romantically. Thats why he still treats me like before without the physical part. He told me he wont date women as well cuz he doesnt want a relationship now. I told him to stop being nice and cut off all contact or i cant move on. Ignore me at work, dont talk to me till im over. Or.. Try to work towards relationship with me. He choose to cut off contact. I wanted to give him a chance to miss me. He says he has no feelings.. I cant believe it. He says he only treats me this way and im his best female friend? Did i make the right decision to cut him off and let him miss me? Or should i have stayed friends with him and show him were great together? He refused my offer also cuz he didnt want to get hurt. Im afraid he will drift away.. I want him back but will this work? Thank u 4 helping me x
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at work, move on, my ex Reply to this Question
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male
reader, goodguy11  +, writes (16 February 2010):
Ummm first thing is don't beg for him your better than that. I think he made it perfectly clear he has no feelings for you anymore and just wants to be friends. He will miss you but probably just as a friend. So let's say it does work and he wants you back because he misses you. You start dating again and then down the road he doesn't want you anymore. You going to cut all contact with him everytime he does that. I suggest you get on with your life. Once those feelings go away they don't usually comeback. If you want to stay friends with him thats fine but don't expect anything to happen. I know it hurts it sucks but you just have to make peace with yourself that it wasn't meant to be. I truly am sorry but this just the way life is.
A
female
reader, SsCcHh  +, writes (16 February 2010):
 It seems like your ex-boyfriend doesn't really know where he is right now. He made a big decision breaking up with you & it still seems somethings there. But you were right to cut contact as you felt you had to move on, how could you know if he was going to eventually decide he loved you again? You being his best friend may not be enough for you forever, and now, without him contacting you, you now have the ability to move on and be your own woman again. You can go out & meet new people, of course you'll have feeling for your ex for a long time, as loving someone isn't always as black and white as it seems, but his contradictory behaviour seems to be confusing and upsetting you, and I believe that your decision is the right one. I hope I've been of some help to you x
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