A
female
age
30-35,
*insara
writes:Ok so I've been with my boyfriend for over a month now and we are very close. We can talk about anything without awkwardness or embarrassment. Just a few days ago however, we were at his house and his family was out. So we were kissing and getting very intimate together, when he said to me 'I think my Dad has some condoms in his cupboard'. I thought about it and proceeded to tell him that we should wait until we were both legal (16) and there could be accidents with the condom etc. He respected my decision. But I felt I was ready and I'm worried I might have hurt his feelings. He would never hurt me or make me do something uncomfortable, but I regretted what I said. So I'm just wondering if I did the right thing by waiting until we were both legal?Thank you in advance :) x
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female
reader, scrazy  +, writes (5 August 2008):
 You are the smartest girl in all the UK, I hope you know that.
YES you were right in telling him that you wanted to wait until you were both 16, that's the best thing you could ever tell him!
If you think you've hurt his feelings, your best bet is to talk to him and explain why you want to wait (and there are many reasons - unwanted pregnancy, STD's, etc...). He's obviously respected your decision and I'm sure if he really cares about you, he'll be willing to wait for you.
And if you two break up over this, just remember. You did make the right decision - sex does not equal intimacy and the whole "if you love me, you would sleep with me" is a lie. You don't need to have sex with someone to show that you love them.
Please, please, PLEASE wait you are 16 to have sex. And give it more then a month before you decide to make such a serious decision - at least wait over 6 months to have sex.
All the Best
XO
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (5 August 2008):
 Hell yes you did the right thing! Good job! Why not wait until you are even older than 16? There is so much for you to look forward to as an adult, please let sexual intercourse be part of it. Anticipation is lots of fun. Plus you want to fully enjoy your teenage years so no worries about getting knocked up will enable that!
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A
male
reader, saltwater +, writes (5 August 2008):
 Course you did the right thing.
However, talking about sex after only going out with someone for a month is a little crazy. Whatever happened to getting to know each other first?
The general rule with losing your virginity is that the longer you leave it the more you'll enjoy it when you finally have it....underage sex can potentially be a terrible experience.
Don't be afraid to keep him waiting! If he has any respect for you he will wait until you are ready. And that's the way it should be!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008): you should wait intill you are legal. this will also make sure he is right for you. im 16 myself and personally am waiting for marriage. that way i will know if he is right for me.
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