A
female
age
51-59,
*meee
writes: Hi All,Over 18months ago, I had a short relationship with a guy I met on dating site which lasted about 4 months. We parted over something really trivial and I did not pursue it any further, we remained friends and lost contact over time. However, we both found each other again and there was that same attraction and we met for a drink and catch up, I was concerned about meeting again for fear of ending up feeling like i used to feel about him, and lo and behold my stomach flips each time i think of him. The attraction was still there.I regret meeting him now, however I did let him know how I felt and he simply replied 'its great you feel that way!' now does this mean that he doesnt feel the same ? His texts seem very confusing and he leaves it so long to reply or I dont hear anything from him at all. Guess that is a pretty clear message, after our meeting he did say he wanted to meet up again. I think he may just need his ego feeding.
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male
reader, bronzed adonis +, writes (31 October 2011):
I would put less energy into this. Its not the behavior of a man who`s bothered about you.
A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (31 October 2011):
I'm currently in a similar situation with a guy I met online, I have known him a couple of months now and he is doing the same to me, taking ages to reply to texts (but still texting daily), not asking to meet up much but he will ask every now and then....
I think this is part and parcel of meeting people online. I have come to the conclusion with my guy that he doesnt know what he wants (i.e. dating, relationship etc) hence why he blows hot and cold with me.
Your best bet is to write him off and meet someone new, if you are still on the dating site then get out there dating again with different men so you are not so focused on this guy. With my guy I have basically decided he is messing me around and I'm tired of it. So we are still in touch, I really like him so if he does figure himself out then I want to still be talking to him, however I am not holding out any hope so I am dating other people.
Keep in touch if you want to with him, but if you feel you wont be able to move on until he is out of the picture then maybe it is best to cut ties. I havent fallen for my guy so hard that I cant get excited about any other men, I went on a date last week with a fantastic guy so it has proven to me that as much as I like the one that is messing me around, I still have the capacity to like other guys as much, if not more.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2011): If he wanted what you want he wouldnt waste time. Dont waste yours.
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A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (30 October 2011):
While there is no way to tell for sure what his motivations were in meeting you. I think you are onto something with your assumption that he just needed an ego boost. Perhaps he was just lonesome and wanted to meet up with a female for casual conversation or maybe he was hoping to have a friends with benefits situation.
Sadly, unrequited love is a tough one to deal with. For him it sounds like it might be there sometime in the future, but right now he is DEFINITELY not feeling that way. I hate to see you get yourself more emotionally invested in this guy. So I do hope that you know that when a man truly cares about you, he'll move heaven and earth to be with you, make you happy, and comfort you. Don't let yourself down by settling for less.
Good luck.
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