A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I ve been with my current bf for almost year and a half.i m 19 and he s 24.Its a long distance relationship,and we see each other every week or two.He is the first guy i ve slept with,so i dont have lots of experience with this but 4 almost a year that we re having sex he only came few times in me and he always needed time and special concentration.He doesnt think its serious,but this situation really hurts me cause it only happened with me,and not with other girls he was with before.I was thinking what could be the problem,cause i dont think its my look,cause i was always very popular with guys,everyone tell me i look like a supermodel,and my bf is also telling me that all the time.So what could be the problem?I was reading on internet,there is a thing called delayed ejaculation,so maybe is that?There are guys that cant come at all,but my bf can every time i do him oral or hand job...or when he masturbates,which he does a lot,because we have this distance thing.I really love him and i would do whatever to fix this,although he enjoys in our sex,which is btw more then good.I would do anything 4 him,i fullfilled every fantasy of his,so what else can i do?Its not all about sex,we have very mature relationship filled with love and trust and i know he would do whatever 4 me,ask 4 a special help or whatever is necessery but i dont think his case is so serious...He is also not scared of pregnancy,he likes the thought of having family with me,am i also on pill for a long time and we re not using condoms.Problem can also be his work,which is very stressful and he works a lot.
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condom, ejaculation, hand-job, long distance Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all a lot...When its up to fantasies that is not the problem :) we experimented a lot!;)
And i do think that too much masturbation,from being apart from me is the problem.I shouldn't be complaining cause our sex is too good,and longgggg cause of his delayed masturbation.Also he makes me come million times before he does.Only thing i worry is 4 later,cause i really want to have family and future with him and think we should start fixing that now :/
Tnx all ;)
A
male
reader, advisorX  +, writes (3 December 2010):
 well its better to talk about it with him or try to ask him about his sexual fantasies. Most couple dont talk about sex because they dont want to feel embarrass. But im telling you., its one technique to have a better sexual life, And dont feel shy to open up with him also about your sexual preferences.
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A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker  +, writes (2 November 2010):
 Very common, darling. Don't sweat it for a moment. It should get better as you spend more time together with less masturbation. Anyway oral is so much fun!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 November 2010):
 If you have read about delayed ejaculation, you must have also read that one of the most frequent cause is simply... masturbating too often :). It creates a mild desensitivization because obviously the firm grip of your own hand is different from what happens during intercourse. Also, when masturbating he is strongly focused on one body part, while during lovemaking he is ( pleasantly ) distracted by sounds smells tastes touches and movements.
In other words he probably sort of trained himself to come, or to come more easily, in a certain way and in other ways it takes longer, that's all.
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