A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I met a guy through a writing group and I immediately liked him. He was friendly with all the girls in my group, so I found it hard to tell if he would ever consider me as more than a friend.When we first met he would email me nearly constantly and in December he asked me to join a special writing project he was heading up. I took all of this as a good sign.Lately I haven't heard much from him and my attempts to start a conversation through email haven't been returned promptly or returned with a single sentence answer. Does this mean he's cooled on me? Is there anything I can do or just write this off as a nonstarter? Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, Artistry +, writes (23 January 2008):
I would not send him anymore e-mails. The responses you have received, with little or less said, are an indication that he is involved in other activities or is just not interested in communicating at the monent. I don't think you need additional non-communicative e-mails to confirm that. I think the better tactic would be to ignore him, if you both are still attending the writing group sessions.
The other thing I would point out is, and think about this, why would you want someone who is not interested in being with you or talking to you. You have so much to offer in a relationship, and if this is a part of his personality, being withdrawn, he is not going to satisfy your emotional needs anyway. So if he does not try to pursue you when you ignore him, let him be, find someone in time who is more responsive to your needs, if you became friends with this person you asked about, you would wind up feeling empty and neglected emotionally. Best of luck to you, don't settle for less than you deserve.
A
female
reader, Sams_WonderWoman +, writes (23 January 2008):
Maybe he is so busy he doesn't have time to write back to you with a long letter. How well do you know this guy, he might be married or have a girlfriend and never said anything about his private life. Or he could be very busy with his job outside of writing...or whatever he does. I would just go with the flow, and not worry too much about it.
I would go out and be with other men and see if your feelings for this man is still there. Don't sit home and wait by the phone or the computer. Life will pass you by before you know it. If he has feelings for you, he will contact you. Just give it time.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2008): In my experience, men who initially show interest and then all of a sudden "cool off" is probably because he met someone else. Don't take it personally though its probably just bad timing or not meant to be between you two.
In any case, I think you have tried your best to show interest and he is showing you in response that his interest has waned. So let it be. Cause if you just "ignore" or overlook his sudden shortness with you, which is a sign of disinterest, and continue to contact him, you will come across as desperate. So be proud, let it go and move on. If he wants to chat with you, he knows how to reach you. Let him do the work if he so pleases. If not, oh well.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (23 January 2008):
It seems that he has no more interest or have cooled.If you are still interested , you will have to try other means of communications.
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