A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Help! I have been seeing this guy a little over a month and it is really going nowwhere. He dosent call me everyday and when he does the conversation is short. I tried to break up with him last week but he called and said he wanted to be with me. He also dosent go out of his way to see me. I like him and am attracted to him and having a hard time letting him go. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, LizBeth +, writes (18 January 2011):
What are the conversations like when you're together? Do you talk to each other without uncomfortable gaps? Are you discussing a variety of things? I ask this because my husband was (and sometimes still is!) a horrible phone conversationalist. In person we're fine, on the phone it's just not good. (Although it has gotten better over the years.) Some men are just not phone people. Especially if they have to be on the phone all day at work.When you say that you have been "seeing" each other for a little over a month, do you mean it has been over a month since your first date, or over a month since you've become exclusive with each other? If it has only been over a month since your first date, it's not unreasonable to not talk every day. And even if you've been exclusive for just over a month, to not talk every day isn't that odd. What DOES bother me in your question is that you say he "doesn't go out of his way" to see you. Does he only see you when it's convenient for him? (Things like on his way home from somewhere else, or after he has been out he stops by, or you always have to go to him.) If he's not making some kind of effort to be with you, he may not be especially "into" you. I'm not advocating playing games, but maybe it's time you let him come after you. Don't be rude to him, just don't call him any more. Let him call you. If he doesn't, he wasn't really yours anyway.
A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (18 January 2011):
 There really isn't enough to go on here. Some guys just don't like to talk on the phone that much or don't have much to say. Perhaps too he doesn't want to smother you and give you plenty of room to get to know each other. But from your initial observations, it doesn't seem like he's that into you.
At this point, I think you should honestly weigh how much interest he has in you. Are you going out regularly? Are you dates fun-filled? Does he seem interested in you? Do you make plans on when to go out again?
I don't think it's too early to ask him where you think your relationship is going and that's the only person you are going to get a true answer from.
Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2011): He may just be a rubbish conversationalist on the phone. I know I am and are many others.
A month is a short time. He may be a little scared of committment and afraid to tell you. To want a call everyday when you have been together only a month is a lot.
Take it slowly and he might come through.
...............................
A
female
reader, gerbera  +, writes (18 January 2011):
Ok, few questions to break it down......
Do you live near each other or a long distance away? What does he do for a job, i mean, without sounding horible, does he work alot? My main questions would be do you know anything about him, as in, my first thought, and im not a typical suspicious female just cautious, was do you think hes married or seeing anyone? I dont want to dash your hopes further but not phoning alot and very short conversations.....have you been on any dates since you met?
...............................
|
