A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Long post, but please read!I'm having a dilemma. Basically, I had this teacher in eleventh grade for economics and the minute he became my teacher I developed a huge crush on him. Literally, could not wait for his class, would make sure I looked really pretty in the morning just in case I saw him all day, would go out of my way to say hi to him. I even ditched some Spanish classes (which I would've ditched without him, probably) with him in the school library. I know I've always been his favorite. I'm smart, I participated in class, I was able to have easy and fun conversation with him about music, movies, TV, books, and politics. He's literally my dream guy except that he's now 31 and was my teacher. He even wrote me my recommendation letter for colleges and I read it (I know, I'm not supposed to!) and it's clear that I'm his favorite and that he likes me a lot. My friends all know I have a crush on him and they've even teased me about it because they see how he acts around me. I've even sent him some of my own writing (aside from school essays) and we've discussed them. We grew very close, as close as being friends with your 30 year old teacher can allow. I've now graduated and turned 18 and because he had such an impact on my high school years, I went out for coffee with him and my dad just as a thank you and get together. We ended up having a really nice time and talked for about two hours. We went out again for coffee and had a great time. At this point, he'd been following me on Twitter and after that second coffee "date" (LOL my dad was there!) he began messaging me on Twitter and we had a few long conversations over that. (It was kind of like instant messaging, but on Twitter.) Eventually, we began texting and that's where I'm at now. I'm leaving home very soon (in about two weeks) and I know I'll see him again. Our texts have escalated quite a bit "romantically" if you know what I mean. They're pretty intense and we talk almost every night. I guess I'm just a little confused. He is 31 and has his own things going on. He has the potential to meet a girl his own age who's really skinny and has all the same things I have. Thinking about that makes me so sad and jealous. I'm just 18 and he has his own life. I don't think he thinks about this in the same way because I have real feelings for him but I think he's just now starting to see me as something different than his younger friends who he likes as a friend. Obviously, he cares about me as a person but I care in a more romantic way. I know it's stupid because obviously I'll leave home and by the time I get back he could have another girlfriend and have totally moved on. Does anyone have any advice or opinions on this situation? I'm so confused. A part of me says not to focus on it too much and to just enjoy and a part of me feels crazy, like he's all I can think about and how I just really want to be his girlfriend but I know it can't happen. Please help!
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female
reader, swordandredrose +, writes (12 August 2012):
You mentioned that you guys talk "almost every night". I think you might mean more to him than just a former student. He might feel the same way as you do but I'm not sure how you can find out. It might be that he feels like he is too old for you and he doesn't want to show that he is interested because he thinks it is taboo.
Just to give you a heads up, you are going to meet so many new people once you go to college. You might even forget about this guy.
I don't have a particular advice for you. All I can say is that do not do anything stupid that you're gonna regret.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (11 August 2012):
 I think you need to be honest with him and tell him how you feel. You are no longer his student therefore that should not stand in your way, however there is a big age gap between the both of you and that could make it difficult for you. At the end of the day he is a teacher and you are just entering college. Your lives are at two different stages, my guess is that he sees this as a bit of fun and he probably does like the attention you give him. Which guy wouldn't when it is coming from a younger girl. However at the same time this does worry my as he is a teacher he should not be going near young girls. Yes you might be 18 now and no longer his student but still he should still be remaining professional in my opinion. My only advice to you would be to be honest with him and see where it goes from there.
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