A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Do you think i should give this man a chance, if he wants to go out with me , despite the age difference ?. I am 27, and he is 60. He is a very kind person. I was seeing another man recently, and he didn't treat me very well sometimes. This man, who is 60, said that he would never treat me the way the other guy did. He winks at me every time he sees me too, and says he thinks i am special, and he says that if he was younger, he would go after me . I'm not sure if he wants to go out with me or not, as he might be worried about the age gap, but do you think he is interested ?. It's quite confusing though, as he tried to help me out with the other man i was seeing too, so i'm not sure how he feels. He was there for me when the guy i was seeing suddenly stopped contacting me too ( he never actually said that he wanted to break up with me. I don't know why . This man, who is 60, and another guy he knows said that the guy i was seeing told them that he thinks the world of me, but if that's so, i don't know why he won't talk to me ). He knew the other man i was seeing before i met either of them. He is single. He has been married once before, but has been divorced for along time.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2011): I don't want to use him as a rebound, so i guess i would be better off waiting a while. I do think he is a nice person, much nicer than the other guy i was seeing !. The guy i was seeing walked out of bars a couple of times when he was upset or in a bad mood, and would leave me on my own. One of the times he did that, i tried to call him to see where he was, but he said he wouldn't tell me, and he switched his phone off later on. I eventually got through to him though and met him somewhere else. It was soon after that that he did a disappearing act. This guy said he was wrong for doing that. He was there at the time that happened. And he was very helpful to me when i was upset. I still kind of miss the other guy, but i don't think i should take him back, even if he wanted me to, as i don't think he has treated me fairly. Denise32, you could be right about this guy having mixed emotions. If he is attracted to me, it makes me wonder how he felt seeing me and the other guy together.
A
female
reader, Rosygirls92 +, writes (18 June 2011):
I think it's a terrible idea. If you really want to puruse a future with him, and have a child. By the time your child is 20, he's already got a foot in the grave and you're still going to be young. Go and try to find a man your own age, it will definetely do you good in the long run
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (18 June 2011):
Aw come on. You are just still smarting because your guy pulled a Houdini on you, and you are looking for a rebound and any attention from any male makes you feel better.
Nithing wrong with that, it's normal that you feel this way, but I am sure that there must be several better candidates for a rebound, around you !
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (18 June 2011):
Well, I guess its quite flattering that a man who is so much older than you is showing interest (not that 60 is considered "old" these days!) Does he seem old to you?
It seems to me that he would in fact like to go out with you but is hesitant because the age gap is so large. His experiences of life are bound to be quite different to what they were when he was your age. Some ways he behaved then, certain attitudes and outlooks he held that many years ago are certain to have changed and matured over the years.
Yours will too, as you get a few more years on you - think of it this way: are you the same person at 27 as you were when you celebrated your 16th birthday? In some ways yes, but in others, no.
Another question is: do you want to reconcile with the man you were seeing? If you had the opportunity to try again with him, would you want to?
Surely, until you can answer that question to your own satisfaction, it's premature to be considering whether or not to give the 60 year old a chance.
He no doubt is well aware of it also. Sounds as if he does find you attractive and MAYBE would like to go out with you, but is being cautious. It also strikes me that he is being genuinely kind and really did want to help you out when you were distressed over the other one. So, some mixed emotions, maybe on his part.
Hope you find this helpful. Good luck!
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