A
female
age
30-35,
*azzie4
writes:My boyfriend and i have been together almost 2 years. we see each other almost everyday and we always say goodbye at the end of the day with a big hug and kiss and an "i love you" We still even hold hands everywhere we go. But recently he has been called a flirt at work by the "new girl" (he called me and told me about it right after work) and sometimes he seems to be throwing around little lies which he use to not do. Though he is still affectionate at times, he is no where around as affectionate as he use to be. We don't live together so sex hasn't been able to be an everyday thing, but it went from a couple times a week to only maybe once a month the last couple months. Is he getting tired of me?? He still says he loves me. I admit, that when he told me about the girl saying he was flirting a lot, i did get mad. And i showed it. Could it be possible that he will hide things from me now??
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female
reader, Jazzie4 +, writes (26 May 2010):
Jazzie4 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all so far for the advice. I do spend so much time with him! Its great. Wow Cnith, being really hard on me there lol. Thanks though, i think almost just like you do when not upset! lol. Everything is fine and i know i was over thinking it at the time. I didnt even really get mad (he just thought i was a little upset)i was just bit jealous since the girl has a huge reputation for being a slut. Looking is fine, even talking to other girls. Its just that one i have a bit of a problem with.
Thanks :)
A
female
reader, cnith +, writes (25 May 2010):
 oohhhh I soooo hate it when girls kill guys for being honest then bitch that he's hiding things from them. It's like your mother killing you for eating out of the cookie jar then getting mad for you sneaking a cookie in the middle of the night.
Now I understand, it's un-nerving to hear that a girl is paying attention to your guy and he's being friendly back. HOWEVER.... being called a flirt and cheating are two different things. PLUS he told you about it. So why did you get mad at HIM for?! I don't get it.
My bf told me he got to ogle some classmate girl's huge tits about two weeks ago. To which I said, really? Well that's nice. Sorry I missed the view. And then I moved on. Now before y'all come crying disrespectful let me just say, he has to put up with me ogling ripped young bodies on facebook as I tend to post pics and make comments on it. So that he had a real life person and I have pictures doesn't make that much difference to me. It's still just visual stimulation. As long as it stays that way, it's fine. I have no problem with it.
Your guy tells you that he got called a flirt. He was upfront and honest about a situation at work just as mine was about a classmate of his. Maybe my guy was trying to see my reaction. Or maybe he was just being honest, like yours was. The point is, I see no reason to get mad in either situation, yours or mine.
But it's over, you screwed up. It's OK. We all make mistakes. You can apologise to him. My guess is he's probably resenting you for the scolding.
And I would take the advice that Caring Guy proposed. You guys need more time together and your guy is missing something. You both are. I see you drifting apart if you continue this way. If that's OK with you, let it happen. If it's not, find a way to get back on track. Make time for him. If he won't make time for you then it's good as gone anyway. Accept it. But my guess is, he's not there yet. He was reaching out to you and you smacked him on the face for it. Not good.
Ask him to help you find ways to get together more and refire that passion for each other. As for the chick at work? Well... sometimes we misread things. A guy being friendly can mean a guy flirting to a desperate girl. Don't take it so seriously. Unless he's the one telling you that yes he was in fact flirting...which I doubt. Doesnt sound to me like he's the type of guy who'd be so mean.
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A
female
reader, StrawberryShortcake86 +, writes (25 May 2010):
I am kind of am in the same situation. We went from having sex almost everyday to not even once a month. We have been together for 3 and a half years now and just recently I have found some disturbing information about him. It sucks to think that somebody you have known for so long has been untruthful to you. I would tell him you need to talk to him and demand the truth. Or maybe even do some snooping of your own.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (25 May 2010):
I think this is a sign that you two need to make sure you're spending time together and doing more. I don't think he's getting tired, but I think him telling you about this other girl is him trying to say that more needs to happen. So make sure that you do more together and spend time talking more. He obviously cares enough to have told you.
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