A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my crush's close friend recently became friends with me. i she and i don't know each other well but she invited me to his house for the fourth of july. i told her i'd love to go but wanted him to invite me so i don't feel like i'm intruding. tonight i will see them both but if he doesn't invite me, should i still go? i won't really know anyone and my crush and i are still getting to know each other. there is also a part two. so my crush's friend became friends with me and she mentions him a lot. i dont really know how we became friends but it just kind of happened. i like hanging out with her but i am also wondering if she's being friends with me because she knows i like him. could being her friend be dangerous?
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female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (4 July 2011):
Hello again. That's good he did ask you. I would have been a bit surprised if he didn't.
But still be wary that she isn't up to something, and that she doesn't want to become his girlfriend.
Surely she will see that you and him have a bit of a thing going together.
But then that seems why she has befriended you out of the blue, don't you think?
Just be careful and stay aware of her movements at the function on the 4th July.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for really great advice! They have never dated though, they've just been friends since they were really young. I know that she dated one of his best friends a year ago too. But good news, he did end up asking me to hang out with them on the fourth of july!!! I completely agree about how odd our new friendship is though. I hope she's not planning anything or hoping to get info out of me. I haven't even mentioned my crush on him.
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix +, writes (3 July 2011):
Hi there. They are still in contact aren't they? The way you said she mentions him a lot.
Is it possible she still has feelings for him?
If he doesn't ask you to the 4th of July get together at his place and his ex is going, well that sounds some alarm bells to me.
Perhaps they still have feelings for each other. Who really knows?
Even though she asked you go to - and it's at his place - it's not really her place to ask you. It would be if it was at her house, but it isn't is it? With that in mind, it's really up to him to ask you - not her.
You are going to have to wait and see if he does.
Don't say anything to him about her asking you. Just don't mention it.
Perhaps you could conveniently be doing something yourself on that night. Rather than wait to be asked.
I'm also wondering if his ex has got some ulterior motives in befriending you in the first place. Don't you think it's a bit odd?
If I was out of a relationship, the last thing I'd be doing is hanging around when there's someone else new in his life. I'd be anywhere but there! In fact, most people would, surely.
Why would you want to be reminded of how things were in your relationship, by seeing him kiss and touch and cuddle you all the time? It'd be upsetting.
I can only think that she has some designs on getting back with him again, by making a friend of you - in order to get close to him again. It seems a bit more than a coincidence to me. I'd be a little suspicious I were you, no matter how good a friend she seems to be to you.
I have some lingering doubts about it.
Just supposing that this is true, and if she goes to his place on the 4th July - and you don't (or don't get asked by him) - They might get pretty cosy in your absence, and by the end of the night, they're back on together, like they used to be.
My guess is then, you won't see her heels for dust!
Please be very, very wary about her motives. I'm not sure they are honourable. Stay aware to what happens from now on.
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